Who you are
by Love-girl2015
Summary: After some unexpected events, Izaya starts being stalked by someone... the thing here is, thanks to those events, he and Shizuo are starting to realize who the other really is... and that will lead to more than a simple friendship.  Shizaya! Ch3 is M
1. Chapter 1: Last time

Lg15: just got this idea ^-^ Yes, it's my first fic on Durarara! Maybe it'll get reviews… maybe it won't… no matter, I just like to give it my best when it comes to you guys ^^ Well, that's enough of my blabbering! On with the fic!

Warning: OOC? Yeah, I think so

Attention: Shizaya! And of course, I do not own Durarara

Chapter 1: Last time…

*_Flashback_*

"_Hello there, Shizu-chan~!" Certain brunet called as he always did._

_Certain blond stopped on his tracks as he furiously turned around growling in anger…_

"_IIIIIIIIZAYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!, I TOLD YOU TO STAY OUT OF IKEBUKURO!" he yelled as he ripped off the ground the poor vending machine that had stood next to him only seconds ago and threw it at the brunet who couldn't help but smirk as he took a step to the side, the vending machine smashing against the near wall._

"_Gosh, Shizu-chan… have you grown slow?" teased Izaya as he approached the furious blond._

"_I'M GOING TO KILL YOU, FLEA!" his fist went straight to Izaya's face but, once again he moved just in time._

"_Ha, ha, ha! You'll have to catch me first, Shizu-chan~!" and with that the usual, cat and mouse game began._

_Shizuo would throw random stuff at the brunet, he would dodge… the usual. But it was one event that changed it all… as they were passing a dark alley, Izaya's phone suddenly rang. Still running, he looked at the name and couldn't help but grin at the caller, looking slightly over his shoulder he picked it up._

"_Hello~!" he answered with his usual cheerful tone._

"_**O-Oniichan...**__" a broken voice spoke through the other line…_

"_Mairu?" the brunet frowned at her fearful tone, it wasn't like her to be afraid. She was mostly like him… as time passed he had grown to love his sisters, and now they were the most precious thing for him._

"_**Iza-nii… I-I'm scared…**__" she whispered_

"_IZAYA!" he looked over his shoulder as he realized he had forgotten all about Ikebukuro's strongest man…_

"_Mairu? What's wrong? Why are you scared? And what the hell is that noise!" he added as the sound of something smashing against probably the floor came from the other line._

"…_**there's someone in here, Izaya**__" this made said brunet's eyes go wide as he kept running… several clients that knew about his siblings had menaced to hurt them, but none had actually tried_

_A shaky breath escaped his lips as he closed his eyes for a mere second… "Mairu, where's Kururi? Is she with you? Do you recognize who's in there?" yes… Izaya Orihara feared for his sister's well-being._

"…_**s-she's here, we're inside your old room… a-and n-no… I don't …**__" Mairu suddenly stopped and Izaya could clearly hear her gasp as the sound of something creaking loudly startled the three of them…_

"…" _Izaya ran, waiting for his sister… but what came next, scared the living soul out of him._

'_**AHHHHHH!'**_

"_**KURURI!...STAY AWAY FROM HER, YOU FREAK!"**__ the sound of the phone falling was heard…_

_Things shattering on the other line… Kururi's pained screams…Mairu's pointless yells, which were suddenly replaced by the same pained one's… until they all stopped and he could hear something metal falling with a loud clang…_

"_**Hello, there… Orihara-san" **__the brunet couldn't believe his ears… no… this… this couldn't be true._

"_Shiki-san…?" he breathed._

"_**Ah… nice to hear your voice, now, are you going to fulfill my wish or should I finish what I started? You know what I want, Orihara-san… wills you come or should I kill this two pests? Time's running out… you were we are, don't bother calling your parents they're death… either way… you'll be mine, Orihara Izaya-"**_

"_What the hell did you do to my sisters!" he yelled slowing his pace…_

"_**Oh~ nothing much… here's Kururi..."**_

'_**I-I-z-za-nii?'**_

"_Kururi… please, please tell me you're ok" pleaded Izaya as he slowed even more…_

'_**(there's) b-blood… (All over) m-me…-'the**__ line went death, making Izaya stop on his tracks…_

"_YOU'RE DEATH YOU FUCKING FLEA!" A street sign was ripped of its place… and thrown at the brunet_

"_Ku-Kururi? Kururi!... KURURI!" just as Izaya yelled his sisters name where he had suddenly stopped, the street sign flew next to him… slicing a deep wound into his shoulders, making him flinch at the sudden pain… but he couldn't stop looking at the phone…he just couldn't._

"_HA! FINALLY CAUGH YOU, YOU DAMMED F-"Shizuo stopped when he saw Izaya suddenly drop the phone… falling to his knees as he buried his face on his trembling hands._

'_I can't cry… I have to be strong for them… especially in front of this protozoan…' he took a deep breath, tears in his eyes …_

"_Damm it, Shiki!" he yelled in pure rage… and finally stood up_

_He looked at the blond who seemed to be petrified on his place after seeing him in this strange behavior…_

"_Seems like you finally got me… Shizu-chan" he whispered as he ran his pale fingers over the wound._

"_h-hey… are you ok?" asked Shizuo as he slowly approached him…_

"_I-…I-"a single tear of desperation ran down his cheek. "I have to get them out of there…"_

"_Who?" Shizuo didn't even know why he bothered to ask, but… for God's sake, the flea was CRYING!_

"_My sisters…" mumbled Izaya before he broke into a run towards Shinjuku…_

_*end flashback*_

(Shizuo's Pov)

That was the last time I saw the flea… it's been 3 weeks now and there's no sign of him, nor his sister's. Is it wrong that I'm starting to get slightly worried? Well, to be honest I've been ever since I saw that tear fall down his cheek…

Yeah, I know that I'm supposed to hate him but, I just can't help it… there's this strange feeling inside of me… but, what is it? I can't possibly care for him so deeply!

…right?

No one has seen him ever since… not Shinra… not Simon… not even Celty… where was he?

All I can say is that now, I find myself walking towards his house… willing to find out what is wrong with the one that is making me feel all of this… things

A/N: Hmm… I'm not really good with this pair, I know it… but I'll try, I've read a bunch of fanfics so I hope I'll get better ^^

If you like it, great… if you didn't, great ^^ I'm just glad you bothered to read it.

Please review even if it was bad, please make let me know!


	2. Chapter 2: Please part 1

Lg15: Hello, guys! Sorry for the mistakes on Chapter one, my mistake I didn't re-read it myself ^^ Thanks for all the Reviews, alerts and Favorites! They all make me really happy, well that's enough (I think…) on with the chapter!

Chapter 2: Please part 1

_I'm running… I'm running as fast as I can… I'm close, just 5 more minutes… and I hope my legs don't give up under me. Desperation flows through my veins…damn Shiki…damn the day I presented him to my sisters… and damn the bastard that dared to touch them!_

_I can see the house… I'm closer than I was, and my pace starts to slow until I finally stop in front of the house. My breathing comes in shaky gasps, as I notice how out of breath I actually was… but I didn't care. _

_I walk up to the door, and place my now shaky hand on the doorknob. I take a deep breath and open it slowly… the first thing that I notice is that it's dark, no lights are on… I take several steps heading for the stairs that would lead to the bedrooms, that is until I tripped over something and nearly fell, but thanks to my good reflexes I grabbed onto the railing of the stairs._

_I reach my hand towards the light switch that has always been next to the stairs and turn on the lights… and action that I instantly regret._

_A gasp escapes the bottom of my throat as I fall to my knees…_

_**~Don't bother calling your parents… they're dead~**_

"_Mama… otosan…" I whisper as my hand reached to caress my mother's cold cheek, they both have stab wounds all over their abdomen area… and another straight to the heart._

_I shut my eyes close… they looked so peaceful, as if they were sleeping. I take in a deep breath as I try to calm the rage that starts fulfilling me…_

_I look at the stairs and don't waste another second to go up and as I walk down the hall I take a look at the walls… to my horror, they're covered in blood… as I stop in front of my old room, I hear the most pained gasp I've ever heard in my life… that sounded like…_

_My eyes widened in realization…_

"_Mairu!" I yelled as I threw the door open… _

_My brain tries to process the scene… Mairu is sitting against the wall, her glassed crushed at her feet, Kururi resting against her… both of them breathing heavily and shivering as they sit there covered in blood._

_I can't help but run to them, and as carefully as I can, trying not to hurt them even further, hug them as tears fall down my face…_

"_Iza-nii… (I'm) c-cold" shivered Kururi._

"_S-she's b-been s-saying t-that f-for a couple o-of m-minutes…" muttered Mairu._

"_Mairu, Kururi you're both freezing…" I say as I feel both of their skins against mine._

_I try to think how to get them out of here… I know I can't leave, because Shiki would send someone to kill them in a matter of seconds… _

_I think I know what to do… but, would it work?_

"_Mairu… can I borrow your phone?" I asked_

_She weakly took it out of her torn jacket and handed it to me._

"_Thanks… does it hurt much?" I asked as I eyed her clearly broken left broken wrist…_

"_Yeah… but it's worst if I try to move it" she mumbled._

_I dialed Shiki's number and waited for the damned bastard to answer…_

"_**Hello, there Orihara-san... I see that you found my present towards you…was it of your liking?"**__ he teased… I could imagine the smirk on his face, clearly…_

"_You're a sick bastard…" I hissed'_

"_**Oh, my! Are you saying that you won't come, because the one's who'll pay-" **_

"_I said I would go, and I will… but if it's not much to ask I would like to take my sisters to get treated…" I said trying to control my anger._

"_**Hmm, that underground doctor friend of yours, right? Ha… you better not tell him anything, or he'll come into this without even knowing it… that includes all of your known people…"**__ he informed me, as if I didn't know that…_

"_I know that, Shiki… I'm not stupid" I almost growled at the thought of anyone else getting hurt because of a fucking sick desire…_

"_**Well, then… I'll give you 2 hours to get them over there… I'll be waiting at your apartment, if you don't mind… and remember this, there's no way you'll escape me again"**__ with that he hung up…_

_I hissed at the phone as I shut it close… I looked down at Kururi and noticed she was unconscious, then at Mairu who was clearly on her way to passing out too…_

_I had to hurry…_

_I gently took Kururi up in my arms, and knelt down so Mairu could climb up to my back…_

"_Iza-nii… your shoulder is bleeding…" she said a littler startled._

_Oh, right… I had forgotten about that…_

"_oh… courtesy of Shizu-chan" I couldn't help but chuckle lightly as I thought about him… these last few weeks have been rarely confusing to me… I don't feel like teasing him… I've just been having the urge to hear his voice… to take a short glance at his gorgeous face… but, what was this feeling on my chest? I felt kind of nervous when I was getting close this afternoon… human feelings are very confusing…_

"_Mairu… close your eyes" I said as we approached our parent's corpses… she quickly did as she saw their feet, and soon the back of my neck was wet with tears…_

_As I walked down the sidewalk I noticed a cab was coming, so I called out to him… and was glad when he stopped…_

"_Hello there, young man… do you need a ride?" hmm, what a nice old man…_

"_Yes... umm, I need you to get me to Ikebukuro and then back here… don't worry, I swear I'll pay you every cent when we reach my apartment…" I said with pleading eyes, he took a glance at my sisters and his glance grew slightly panicked and full with concern._

"_What happened to them? They're all covered in blood!" he yelled as he gestured me to get in quickly… and I did, gently placing Kururi on my lap and closed the door as we started off to Ikebukuro…_

"_they're my sisters… someone hurt them, and now I'm bringing them to a friend of mine… he's a doctor, then I have to come back and solve this" I decided to inform him a little, I didn't say anything I shouldn't have…_

"_My… you won't be killing anyone right?" he asked as he skipped several cars._

"_No… I'm not a murder… here's the address" I handed him a little piece of paper in which I had written it with a pen that had been on the seat when I entered the cab…_

"_Hai… we'll be there soon"_

"_I'll be back soon!" I called as I raced upstairs and as soon as I was in front of the door, I knocked several times and called for him…_

"_Shinra, open the door!" I yelled_

"_Coming! Geez, Izaya what are you-... what happened to them!" he yelled when he saw Mairu and Kururi._

"_Someone tried to kill them…" I mumbled as he started checking on them…_

_Soon enough they were both hooked up to all sorts of wires and tubes…_

"_You were just in time… if you had taken a little longer, Kururi would be gone right now…" he said as he stared at the Orihara siblings…_

"_Are they going to be ok?" I asked with fear…_

"_Mairu, will be fine… she just lost some blood and of course her broken wrist… but Kururi, I have to wait until tomorrow or something… she' s got some broken ribs, her shoulder is dislocated… a stab wound… she's a mess… what kind of monster did this?" asked Shinra._

_I felt tears build up in my eyes at the result of a sick game… my sisters… I nearly lost them, if I had been another second late…_

_I clenched my teeth as I took a deep breath…_

"_Shinra, promise me that you'll take good care of them…" I said_

"_What do you mean? Are you leaving them?" he asked in panic…_

"_I have to settle this…" I mumbled._

"_Izaya, you can tell me… you can trust me…" he said as he placed a hand on my shoulder…_

"_Shinra… please… I can't! Because if I tell anyone… please, I don't want anyone else to get hurt…I won't be able to live with myself…" I told him as I clenched my fists…_

_He stood there silent… so I headed towards the door, but stopped before I went out…_

"_Thanks, Shinra…"_

_I walked back towards the cab and told him I was ready to go back to Shinjuku…I really didn't feel like walking… this day has been a living nightmare… and what was about to come, would only make it worse… I'm scared, but instead of thinking about Shiki… my thoughts are on a certain blond… I think about how I've been feeling these last few weeks…_

_So, if someone were to be reading my thoughts… I want you to know, that I finally realized something…_

_I don't hate Shizu-chan… in fact; I think I might be…_

_Falling in love_

_A/N: well there you go, part 1! ^^_

_Next chapter I end up with the flashbacks and we go back to Shizuo walking towards Izaya's apartment, really hope it didn't suck, if it did oh, well~!_

_Lol, thanks for reading! Reviews are always welcome! Sayonara! ^-^_


	3. Chapter 3: Please pt 2

**Lg15: You guys are too nice ^^ Lol, this Chapter ends to what happened to Izaya, and then on Chapter 4 we go back to Shizuo walking towards Izaya's to see why he's been missing… (I believe I already told you that… tch, shame on me XD) Enjoy the chapter!**

**Warning: sort of lemony? I don't think so; I really suck at it so… very, very, very, VERY slight lemon? Ugh, I don't think it'll be considered lemon from what I've read but, oh well ^^ I warned you just in case you do consider it as lemon (really…. I don't think you will O.O)**

CHAPTER 3: PLEASE, DON'T…. pt 2

_For what seemed to be seconds to me… we finally arrived at my apartment. I looked out the window, clearly unwilling to step into my apartment… but I have to._

"_Um, I'll be right back, sir…" I mumbled as I stepped out of the cab…_

"_Alright…" said the old man with a grin._

_I gave him a weak smile as I turned around and quickly went upstairs…_

_I turned the knob expecting it to be open, and it was…_

_As I opened the door, I couldn't help but shiver. 'Ok, Izaya…look for the money, pay the old man' I kept repeating that to myself as I walked towards my safe box… I grabbed a couple of yen and turned around, but as I was about to take a step towards the door and arms made its way around my waist and I felt someone breathing into my neck._

"_Where are you going, Izaya-kun?" Shiki murmured as his nose traveled the edge of my now pulsing neck…_

"_I'm just going to pay the cab, I'll be back…" I said, not looking at him._

"_That won't be necessary… "He whispered._

"_What do you mean? I told him that I would be right back, I have to pay him…" now I was getting irritated…_

_He scoffed, and then roughly grabbed my chin so his lips were next to my ear…_

"_He's dead…" right then… a bang was heard all over my apartment._

_Shiki, still holding my waist, lead me towards the window which had view towards the main street….the sight made my eyes widen._

_Two of Shiki's men were carrying a body towards a nearby alley…_

_Another shiver ran down my spine as his hand made its way under my shirt… _

"_Now where were we? Ah, yes…" there was a sudden pain on my neck and as my eyes looked to the side I could see a needle coming out of it… my arms started feeling heavy as well as my legs, but when they gave out, Shiki grabbed me up in his arms and went straight towards my bedroom…_

_He dropped me on the bed, grabbed my arms and cuffed them to the headboard, when I looked back at him I noticed the bulge on his underwear when he started to pull down his pants… and that's when I started to feel panicked._

_What the fuck is wrong with this sick bastard? He climbed on top of me, a sort of maniac look on his aging features…_

_Once again, his hand started caressing my chest, as he bent down and started kissing my neck... I've never felt so disgusted in my whole life… his breath smells like alcohol, great now I know he's almost drunk…_

"_What's with the look on your face? Hmm, I wonder if it would be the same if I were… Heiwajima-san, Hm?" he said in between the small bites he was giving on my neck and chest…_

"_Don't…bring him… into this…" I managed to say as he started kissing me roughly, clearly bruising my trembling lips…_

_His smirked for a second… but I guess he didn't want to waste time on conversation._

"_Hmm… you're not even hard yet, Izaya… I'm not very patient, so I'll just have to enjoy it myself…" he teased as he looked at me with a perverted look on his face._

"_I…would never… give you… the pleasure to see me enjoy something… like this, especially since it's you" I spat at him with pure venom on my voice._

"_Now that wasn't very nice of you… you'll regret that"_

_It all happened so fast… it's sort of a blur, but I remember when he roughly, almost desperately pulled down my pants and underwear… and then, everything I felt was pain._

_I remember hearing my voice, screaming in pain and agony…. I remember his voice, moaning in pleasure as he pushed into me each time with much force… I felt the warmth of my blood as it rolled down my tight… I could feel the warmth of my tears as they wet my face… I could hear my pained gasps… I remember my weak mumbles, pleading him to stop… but he just wouldn't listen._

_Had it been minutes? Hours? I don't really know… but finally, he came into my insides and with a smirk on his face he made one more painful thrust and finally pulled out of me. Kind of harshly he pulled my pants back up and uncuffed my aching arms which fell limply to my sides…_

_He bent down once more and kissed me on the lips, when he stopped I took the opportunity and spit him… his hand made contact with my left cheek afterwards, probably leaving a bruise behind… but, what would he care? He finally got what he wanted…_

"_Imbecile… thank you for that wonderful pleasure, I hope it isn't the last time… what am I saying? It won't be the last time, my dear Izaya… but remember this, no matter where you hide from me I'll always find the way to make you come out from wherever you are… it was so easy this time, your sisters looked as the perfect prey so, why not? Je… *sigh* see you soon, Izaya-kun" with that he left me in the middle of my bed which was covered in his disgusting cum and my own blood… but I guess I could care less about that right now…_

_I got off of my bed and stumbled towards the living room… the pain on my tight was terrible, but I would just have to bear with it… I curled up in a ball as I let myself fall onto the couch, and I cried._

_I cried while I thought… Were Mairu and Kururi alright? I knew they would be… it's Shinra we're talking about; he always finds a way to heal you… I wondered what Shizu-chan might be doing right at this moment, as tears kept flowing down my face I glanced at the clock…_

_11:15p.m. it read…. Hmm, he's probably about to go to sleep… before I could think about it I grabbed my phone and looked in my contacts… when I was about to press the green button I stopped._

_Why would I call him? Would he even listen? Would he even care? Why him in the first place, the person that hated him the most?_

_I pressed the green button and unwillingly held the phone in my ear as I sobbed…_

"_**Hello…?"**__ my heart skipped a beat when he I heard his voice, he sounded kind of groggy so I figured he was about to go asleep._

_I opened my mouth to call his name, but no sound came out… more tears built up in my eyes as I quickly hung up as a pained sob escaped the bottom of my throat and I cried… cried… and cried._

_*end flashback*_

That's basically what I've been doing for the last few weeks… just cry. I'm barely eating; I don't really remember the last time I did… I can still feel Shiki's hands caressing my, now, bruised body… the pain as he pushed into me… it's just not something you can forget from night to morning…

I remember the look on Namie's face when she came in the next day… first she smirked, but when she saw me limping her face turned sort of concerned, funny right? I told her to take a few weeks off and not to worry that I would still pay her… that I just needed to be alone.

And I couldn't hide my surprise when she asked if I was alright… we had just stared at each other for what seems like eternity, and then I told her not to worry about it… she had blushed in embarrassment and denied she was worried before storming out of my hunting apartment.

And now I just lie here… looking into a far spot on the wall…

I would take on Shizu-chan beating the hell out of me anytime… I would prefer to imagine that's what happened three weeks ago in here… but I just can't.

And I can't help but wonder, what would he do if he saw me like this? Probably laugh at me, and take the advantage to kill me once and for all… yeah, that actually sounded nice… I just want to disappear… I just want to die…

Little did I know, I was about to get the answer to that question as certain blond was only seconds away from knocking at my door…

**A/N: hmm… lemon? Nah… Lol anyway! Hope you all liked this chapter, thank you so much for all the reviews, alerts ad favorites ^^**

**Tomorrow's Monday so… I don't think I'll be able to write the next chapter until Friday or something… maybe in Wednesday since I don't have school that day, so I have to see if my teachers have mercy and they give us no homework so please pray with me that I'm free on Wednesday XD**

**Well, thanks for reading, please review! ^^**

**Sayonara~!**


	4. Chapter 4: It's just me

Lg15: Hello! Thank you all so much! So sorry for the late update once again ninth grade is killing me! But, here I am with a new chapter ^^ hope you like it. Please read the end note!

_**Abc **_Izaya's thoughts

_Abc_ Shizuo's thoughts__

Chapter 4: it's just me

(Shizuo's Pov)

_Why am I here? _I asked as I found myself in front of Izaya's door… willing to figure out what the fuck he's been doing for the last 3 weeks. _Probably planning something as always…damned flea._

*BANG BANG*

No answer…

"Hey, Flea! Open the fucking door or I'll kick it open myself!" I menaced.

Then again, no answer…

"Don't say I didn't warn you!" but, when I was about to, probably, rip it open, I noticed that it was already slightly opened…

My eyes narrowed as I slowly approached the door, waiting for the flea to come out of nowhere and cut me with his precious blade… but nothing happened as I reached it.

With a shaky hand I pushed it open… a loud creak floating through the air.

Inside it was dark… I took a step, and another and another…. That's when I saw him, yet I couldn't believe it was him… it just wasn't possible!

Right there on the couch, he was curled up hugging his knees as he looked at a far point in the wall… but that's not what made my heart actually clench…

His eyes… his once sparkling with pure amusement eyes were now empty, cold, lost and out of color, horrible bags under his once flawless orbs, his skin, if actually possible, was paler than usual.

This can't be Izaya Orihara… right? I mean, it just can't be!

"I-…I-Izaya?" I manage to whisper

(Normal Pov)

Startled Izaya fell to the floor, as a soft whimper escaped his lips from the impact…. But once again, he just curled up covering his face.

"Izaya, what the hell are you doing?" muttered Shizuo as he approached the brunet.

"S-stop…s-top it…-iki…" Izaya mumbled as he hugged himself tighter.

"Flea?" Shizuo asked, his voice coming out in a concerned murmur, he knelt down and as slowly as possible and reached towards Izaya's shoulder. .. Until he finally touched it.

"GET AWAY FROM ME, PLEASE! STOP, STOP, STOP IT, PLEASE!... d-don't hurt me a-anymore…PLEASE!" Izaya's sudden outburst made Shizuo actually stumble back a little, his eyes wide at the brunet's terrified pleading yells. Shizuo's mind only wandered one thing and one thing only at this moment: _what happened to you, flea? Why are you so scared? Why do you suddenly look…so fragile, so easily breakable? Why?_

Yet, Shizuo reached for the raven's other shoulder, holding it as tight and gently as possible.

"DON'T! PLEASE JUST-"but Izaya's new plea was cut off short as Shizuo embraced him in a tight hug, Izaya struggled…desperately trying to get away from his "attacker".

"Izaya...stop crying, please" said the blond… _why? Why does it hurt so much to see you cry? Why does it anger me to think of anyone touching… daring to hurt you? That should only be ME… so, please Izaya…_

"PLEASE… LET ME GO, PLEASE" kept crying Izaya, but Ikebukuro's strongest man's hold was, of course, way stronger than his… so he just hoped that this man would finally let go…

"Izaya… it's just me… Shizuo, you know… Shizu-chan" whispered Shizuo as one of his hands caressed Izaya's hair, feeling as the other's whole body shook from evident fear…. From what? _That_ he wanted to desperately know.

_**Shizu-chan…? Why… did I just hear his voice… so, so full of concern? I guess I must be dreaming, that man… the one who my heart secretly belongs to has always hated me… **_

"Izaya… flea, DAMN IT SNAP OUT OF IT!" yelled Shizuo as he took a hold of Izaya's face and slightly slapped his cheeks, hoping that those eyes would focus on him. 

_**I say that it is impossible for him to be here… but what is this warm feeling around my body? Whose hand was caressing my hair so… so lovingly? Who's holding my face… like this?**_

"IZAYA FUCKING SNAP OUT OF IT, DAMN IT!"

_**There's a light in the middle of my darkened field of vision… so close, it is getting closer and closer and closer and closer…my shaky hand reached towards it… and now, I can finally see….**_

Izaya blinked as tears kept flowing down his ghostly pale cheeks and onto a certain blond's strong hand. The brunet slowly looked up at him, releasing a shaky breath…

"Shizu-chan…" he whispered weakly…

For once, Shizuo didn't mind him calling him that name… honestly, it had never actually LITERALLY bothered him, it' just angered him… the reason? He didn't even know himself.

"Izaya…" said the other one, glad that his nemesis had finally "woken up" from his trance. "What happened to you?" he asked directly to the point, making it quite obvious how truly, though he would never admit it (for now) how sick worried he was.

"I-…I-.." Izaya tried to hold back a sob, at the flashback that quickly flooded his mind "Shizuo... please, don't leave me alone… please" Izaya started to cry harder, holding onto Shizuo's vest for dear life as he shook.

Shizuo needed to hear no more… he looked around the apartment once again, and his eyes narrowed. Something… something horrible happened in this apartment that day… and he was willing to figure out what it had been.

He looked back at Izaya and then with a determined look hugged the informant closer and got up…

_I don't know what's wrong with me… I just feel this thing on my chest, all I know is that it is towards the beaten brunet I hold in my arms… it is clearly not hatred, so… what is it?_

Still confused with all those strange feelings taking control of his heart and mind, the blond broke into a run just as he felt Izaya's head fall limply against his chest.

LG15: Well, I guess it hasn't been the best chapter at all… but I really had a hard time writing this, because I had the idea of what I'll be writing, but this chapter... Lol I just didn't know ^^ hope it didn't suck that bad; I'll try to make the next one way better.

Sorry if you didn't like it, I know it could have been better… but I'm exhausted from school and well I felt guilty because I hadn't updated in a long time so I tried to write it now ^^

Well, let's see how it goes… I'll start thinking of the next chapter right now, 'kay? I'm sorry

Could you tell me how it was? I would really appreciate it, thank you for reading! Sayonara, my dear readers.


	5. Chapter 5: What?

**Lg15: Hello there ^^ Here's a new chapter I hope you enjoy it Sorry for the wait! Oh, and Happy Late Thanksgiving's day, everyone! ^^ (I was supposed to update on Thursday… I'm sorry)**

_**ABC **_Izaya's thoughts

_ABC _Shizuo's thoughts

Chapter 5: What?

(Shizuo's Pov)

"SHINRA!" I yelled as I knocked the door loudly several times with my arm while I held Izaya's seemingly broken body with the other. 

The underground doctor gave no response… I kept knocking and then anxiously looked at the informant that lay limply on my arms.

I sighed furiously at his sick appearance, I shook my head in rage… rage towards the responsible for this.

_I swear that if I find out whom the hell did this I will-_ but… would I really? I've always hated violence… hell; I've hated it since I understood what it was! So, would I really be willing to kill, just for a person that I HATE with all of my soul? Or… do I really hate him? Damn, I'm so fucking confused!

I resumed the knocking, each time with much force… until, finally I heard the underground doctor behind the door.

"Shizuo, I told you to wait a second! Did you not hear that I was tending someone!-"the underground doctor started as he opened the door but stopped when he saw the nearly dead body that I held on my arms.

"I-…I-Izaya! Shit, Shizuo I'm sorry come in, set him on the couch, I'll be back!"Yelled the doctor as he quickly disappeared, probably looking for his equipment.

As I went towards the couch I held him closer to me and, almost unconsciously, I lowered my head and felt his… His skin feels so cold… once I got there I laid him as gently as possible, afraid that I might break him even further.

Suddenly, as I looked at his beaten pale skin, I felt the urge to caress his bruised cheek… so I did.

Soft… very, very soft… period, I have no idea of how long I kept looking onto his closed eyelids… but what brought me back was the nearly panicking voice of the underground doctor.

"Shizuo, I need you to bring him to the bed, please… make it quick! Come on" he said in a hurried voice.

I did as I was instructed, once again feeling a strange sensation up in my chest… w-was Izaya going to die? No… it-it just wasn't possible, this is Orihara Izaya we're talking about here, yet… hi is still completely as human as any other person out there in the streets of Ikebukuro.

"Wait outside, Shizuo… don't look at me like that! I need you to be outside!" he exclaimed when he saw my disapproving gaze.

I sighed as I took shaky steps towards the door…yes, I Heiwajima Shizuo was afraid of losing the man that has made my life "miserable" since I met him in high school…

~3 hours later~

[Shizuo, calm down, please? If something had went wrong, Shinra would've come out of that room. Izaya is going to be fine] I read after Celty quickly tipped up her comforting words… was it so obvious that I was dying of worry? Apparently, yes.

"I know, Celty… but I can't help it, y-you weren't there when I found him… h-he, he just freaked out when I touched him, he cried like I never thought I would see him… I mean, he's always been so full of pride, technically saying that he was not human… but now I can actually see that he is as human as anybody else" I said as I held my head shamefully… why? I don't even know for myself.

Maybe… I felt guilty for not caring if he was alright until now?

[Hmm… so you care about him?] She tipped.

Silence filled the room…. How much time passed? Seconds…minutes, maybe? I am not completely sure, but I can see that my answer surprised her…

"…Yes, I-I care about him… heck, Celty… I-I think… that I love him" I whispered, and felt a little heat coming up my cheeks.

[Aww... Shizuo, you're blushing~!] She tipped happily.

"S-shut up, Celty" I muttered as I hid my face behind my bangs.

Out of nowhere, a creak came from the door that led towards where Shinra had been working over Izaya… and out came the doctor.

But that wasn't what made me even more worried… it was the disbelieving look on his features.

[Shinra?]

"Shinra, is he going to be ok?" I asked automatically.

"N-no…I-I mean yes, he's going to be alright… but-…" he muttered as he shook his head.

"…"

"Izaya… he… he was raped" said the doctor as he sank against the couch.

Everything seemed to stop, as my blood boiled in a sudden rage… a sudden hatred, a sudden need to beat the living hell out of whoever had done this…

"…What?" I managed to growl out.

**Lg15: well, there you go ^^ it was somewhat short, but it was something, right? I'm sorry for my laziness and my lateness -_- I hope you all forgive me, onegai?**

**Well, I'll update as soon as possible, 'kay? ^^ sayonara~!**


	6. Ch 6: Waking up to rest in nightmare pt1

**LG15: Sorry for not updating in like 18 days… I have no excuse so you have all the rights to kill me ^^ by the way, the title I chose for this chapter is a mix of: waking up, living nightmare and rest in peace. (I don't even know why the hell I told you that -_-) **

**Disclaimer: I do not own Duararara! (Of course I don't… why would I be here then? -_-)**

_**ABC **_**Izaya's thoughts**

**ABC ****Shizuo's thoughts**

Chapter 6: Waking up to rest in nightmare Part 1

The only thing that could be heard on Shinra's living room was Shizuo's heavy breathing as he tried to control the rage that ran through his veins. Shinra was still on the couch, holding his head as he shut his eyes and Celty just stood there not even bothering to lean down and pick up her PDA, which had fallen off her hands when she heard those words.

"…Are you _completely_ sure, Shinra?" murmured Shizuo not looking up, his eyes covered by his blonde bangs.

Shinra slowly looked up; he felt a hand on his shoulder and looked up to see Celty. She gave it a small squeeze as if saying that it was going to be alright… he forced a weak smile as he placed his hand over hers.

Taking one big, shaky breath, Shinra nodded almost too quietly…but the blond heard him.

"…_shit"_ hissed Shizuo as he ran a hand through his hair in frustration.

Once again, there was silence… and they gladly welcomed it… that is until…

"…S-Shinra-kun?" a voice called from the door that lead toward the special (?) rooms.

"…Mairu?" Shizuo stood up in shock at her appearance. She looked like she hadn't been able to sleep in days, skinnier than usual if even possible... and there was a cast that went from her wrist to the middle of her arm. Not to mention a couple of bruises, that seems like they had been healing for a while.

"Hey, Mairu… what are you doing up? You hungry?" asked Shinra as he walked over to her.

"Not much… have you heard from Iza-nii?" she asked, the expression on her face sickly worried.

"…A-"but just as Shinra was about to respond, a scream… so loud yet, so drowned echoed through every inch of the underground doctor's apartment. It's source? Izaya's room…

They all looked at each other, eyes wide… as it wouldn't stop. Not thinking twice, all of them raced toward Izaya's room, just as the screaming was replaced by… painful sobs.

~Before any of that~

_Izaya's sub-conscious/ Nightmare (?) Izaya's Pov_

_Everything is dark… in this sorrowful place, where I find nothing more than hunting memories. There's bad one's… I see myself, the first time Shiki tried to…_

"_**I find myself unable to rephrase such a word… how seemingly pathetic I truly am…" **__I can't help but lightly smile at my weakness… I appear to be so "strong" even though I don't have such a strong appearance, but that has always been a fucking lie._

_Another memory passed by, it's from 3 weeks ago… when I found my parent's corpses and my sisters._

_My sisters… I wonder if they're alright…_

"…_Iza-nii… (I'm) here…" That sounded like…_

_I turn around and there she was…but, she didn't look completely calm as she always did back at home. She looked somewhat sad… _

"_Kururi!" I run to her and fall to my knees as I hug her, never wanting to let go._

"_You're alright… where's Mairu?" I ask as I look around in a better mood…_

"_Recovering… (She's at) Shinra's…" she said as I finally broke the hug… taking a look at her._

_My eyes widened in horror… suddenly from her normal healthy appearance, she turned back to when I found her…_

_Her breathing became heavy as I heard the sickening cracks that came from her ribs as they broke once more, she let out a piercing scream as her arm hung limply after her shoulder snapped out of place. Blood started gushing from her side as the stab wound appeared once more… she finally fell to the side with a silent thud as she let out an agonized whimper escape her pale throat._

"…_K-Kururi…" I shivered as the dark place turned into my old room… just like 3 weeks ago. But this time there was nobody there… no stranger, no Mairu… just the two of us._

_I started to walk towards her when she suddenly started gasping and screaming… as if someone was beating her… _

_Bruises appeared all over her body… especially on her face and her neck… I couldn't take it anymore._

"_**STOP IT, STOP, STOP, STOP! LEAVE HER ALONE!"**__ I yelled completely out of it as I took her in my arms, holding her tight as we both shivered at the sudden coldness that filled the room._

"_Tch, tch, tch… Orihara-san…"__ a voice said from the doorframe… oh and of course I knew who it was._

"…_**Shiki-san…"**__ I hissed, but the fear in my voice was evident._

"_It seems that you have a little stain on your clothes…" __He said as he started laughing._

_I looked down and quickly regretted it…_

"_Ni…Nii-san…" murmured Kururi as she seemed to be drowning on her own blood…_

"_**No, no Kururi… hang in there, please"**__ I whispered._

"_(But) Nii-san… (I'm) already… dead" she whispered and time seemed to stop for me… the only thing I could hear was Shiki's maniac laughter…_

"…_**what?"**__ I asked in disbelief as she seemed to be melting… turning into blood as I held her…._

"_(I) died… (Last) night…Shinra… (Doesn't) know, (I) wasn't… (Hooked up to) machines… anymore… (They) think… (I'm) sleeping…" she murmured between gasps… I felt tears in my eyes… my sister… my little sister was dead… and I couldn't do damn thing about it! _

_Shiki-san…Shiki-san is going to pay…I-I don't know how, b-but I'll make him pay… H-he took my sister away from me!_

"_**Why…*sob* how are you here…it's-"**__I started crying right there, I couldn't help it…_

"_(I) came… (To) say… goodbye, Nii-san, I love you" and with that, what once was my sister in my arms… turned into, a slowly dripping from my arms, puddle of blood._

_I let out the most painful sobs I had ever heard in my entire life as I shook… my hands grasped at nothing but thin air…_

"_Oh~! How pitiful, ne? Orihara-san?" __he snickered._

_I looked up at him with hatred, but I wasn't able to form an insult good enough for a piece of crap like him…_

"_Now…where was I?"__ before I could even blink, I was pinned against the floor over my sister's blood._

"_**G-get off me… No, stop!" **__I pleaded as new tears flowed down my cheeks._

_He ignored me of course, he turned me around… took off my pants…_

_And I screamed._


	7. Chapter 7: Falling for you

**A/N: I think I've lost readers… how depressing = (. Well, no one cares anyways so… yeah. Merry Christmas everyone!**

Chapter 7: Falling for you

~Normal Pov~

Izaya's sobs were quiet but the pain in them was clearly there. Everyone stood there in shock, no one dared to move into the room. Izaya was curled up in the bed, hugging his frame… which shook violently.

None of them knew for how long they had been standing there… but the first to make a move was Mairu. Taking cautious steps, as if not to scare her brother any further, she made her way next to the bed. Her hand reached towards her brother's hesitantly… until it finally gently touched the pale trembling hand.

At first Shizuo thought that the informant would start screaming, begging for her to not hurt him… just like it had happened when he found him over at his apartment. But, he was wrong… Izaya seemed like he was going to panic, as he tensed for a second, but it seemed like he slowly recognized it was his little sister who stood next to him… not some _evil_ person, as Shizuo had named the reason for the fear his informant was going through… wow, wow, wow _HIS_ informant?

_What is the matter with me! Why did I take the liberty to call him mine, huh? And… why… why did it feel so nice… to say he was mine? … UGH! I'm so fucking pissed at me right now; I may throw a vending machine at myself! Ok, Shizuo… stop it, Izaya Orihara is NOT yours, he's just an annoying flea, that likes making your life miserable and smiles too much… but yet, I love his smile… JUST STOP THINKING HEIWAJIMA! _Shizuo thought furiously as he rubbed his temple annoyed at his person. Was he really falling for the informant? It just couldn't be… right?

His thought were interrupted by a weak voice that filled every corner of the somewhat big room…

"…M-Mairu?" whispered Izaya as he slowly tried to sit up, he was wearing a button up shirt that was clearly a little too big for him, and some sweatpants Shinra had given to him. He sat there for about 20 seconds until he pulled his little sister into a tight hug as he kissed her forehead.

"I'm sorry… I'm so sorry…" he kept whispering as new tears rolled down his cheeks. Izaya suddenly jolted his head up as if he had just remembered something very important, his eyes widened for a second before he turned towards the underground doctor.

"…Shinra, w-where's Kururi?" He asked as if he didn't know what awaited him…

"Oh, she's in the room upfront, she's sleeping… the wound on her abdomen still hasn't fully healed as well as her shoulder… she's been rarely tired this last few days…" as he said this, he sounded thoughtful.

"Wow, hey… I don't know what the hell is going on in here… You didn't give me time to ask earlier, but what the hell happened to Mairu and Kururi? Why are they here? And why does it look like they've been, apparently, recovering here for weeks?" Exclaimed Shizuo, not getting why the little Orihara was bandaged up…

Shizuo looked from Shinra, who was looking at the informant and then at Izaya who was looking at him with a surprised look on his face and if you looked really, really close with a slight blush on his over paled cheeks.

_Is he… no, I must be having delusions from lack of sleep… yeah, that must be it… but, damn it… he looks so cute…no, no STOP IT_ thought the blonde as he shook his head a little

_**S-Shizu-chan… I hadn't even noticed that he was standing there; he seems unusually quiet today… ah! Why am I blushing! This is so embarrassing! And… what did he mean by earlier… oh, that's right… he brought me here after… he found me… but, does that mean he stayed here all this time?...h-how sweet of him… Izaya Orihara, stop it! What are you thinking; this is Shizuo Heiwajima for god's sake! You two hate each other remember!... Right? Ugh, I'm so confused… I hope he didn't notice my blush… WHY DO I CARE IF HE SAW IT OR NOT! UGHHHHHHHH!**_ Izaya closed his eyes for a moment coming back to reality… right, Kururi… his little sister, who he knew was… he shook his head trying to clear his thoughts… it was so much, this emotional _thing_ for his dear Shizu-chan… what happened that horrid night 3 weeks ago… his sisters… Kururi's death… it was too much to progress at the time, but he would have to deal with it as best as he could…

He opened his eyes and looked at Shinra… whispering one single thing before another single tear escaped his eyelid…

"…tell him"

Shinra looked towards Celty who had been truly quiet the whole time and watched as she tipped something on her PDA…

[Tell him, Izaya said so… and he has to know]

Shinra sighed and smiled at his lover… taking a deep breath, he told everything he knew to the blonde.

"… well, you see… Shizuo, three weeks ago Izaya came here a little after 9:30 p.m. with his sisters at hand all covered in blood. They were both in a terrible state, Mairu's wrist was broken and there were lots of cuts and bruises on her body… which as you can see are still healing, but Kururi… she was far worse and she's still in no condition to walk on her own without getting dizzy from all of her blood loss… the other night she woke up screaming, I don't know what exactly happened… none of them are willing to tell me" he finished pointing at the siblings.

Izaya's gaze was somewhere in the wall, his eyes were glazed over as if he were having a flashback… and as guilty as Shizuo was feeling for not caring enough to go after the raven after the sudden call and his desperation for getting his sisters out of only God knows where, his legs moved on their own as he slowly approached him… his hand, now somewhat shaky if you looked close, reach towards the informant's shoulder… and as he placed it on it, Izaya flinched and nearly flew away from the touch…

"…d-don't… p-please…don't h-hurt me…" he whispered as he dragged his malnourished body as far as the bed and the wall would allow it to.

Shizuo couldn't help but wince at the fear and weakness of the other's voice…

_I swear… whoever did this is going to go through hell itself when I find out…damn it, I can't take seeing him like this, I just want to hold him in my arms, and tell him how sorry I am for not being there for him when he needed it, and how he wouldn't let anyone ever hurt him again but, right now Izaya needed their help, he fears the mere touch on his skin will make it all happen again… I hate how weak and broken he looks, I hate how that mischievous and sarcastic smile is absent on his lips… yeah, I know it can annoy you but… he just looks so beautiful when he truly smiles… I've seen him do it a few times in the last few days… yes, I admit it: I LOVE IZAYA'S SMILE! There, you happy Shizuo? Heh, I'm talking to myself now… is this how being in love really feels? If it is… then I like it _Shizuo thought as he backed away from the bed, giving the one that's making him have all of this monologues some space.

"Iza-nii? Didn't you want to see Kururi?" asked Mairu trying to get her brother's mind off the, unknown to her, horrible memory.

Snapping out of it and blinking slowly, Izaya softly nodded, his sister supported him with her body, just so he wouldn't fall…he needed to eat something soon, but she knew he wouldn't until he saw their sister.

Slowly walking towards the door, Izaya suddenly stopped…

"…Shizu-chan?" he whispered timidly, as hi bit his lip trying to stop the heat coming up his cheeks as his free hand reached towards the blonde.

Shizuo's eyes widened… Izaya was looking down, and from where he stood Shizuo could notice the blush he was trying to hide… interlacing his fingers with the brunet a small smile appeared on his lips as they continued towards the other room, only one of them knowing fully what awaited behind that wooden door.

_Izaya…_

_**Shizu-chan…**_

_**I'm really falling for you… aren't I? **_

**There you go guys, I hope it was good enough ^^ Yes, there's another chapter with part 2 from 'Waking up to rest in nightmare' which is the next one, I didn't place it on his one, cause I think it just doesn't fit it, so I named it like this. YES, IZAYA'S AND SHIZU-CHAN'S THOUGHTS WHERE THE SAME IN THAT LAST LINE ^^ I love you all, and I am so sorry for not updating as I should**

**Merry Christmas, everyone~! Write you all soon~!**


	8. Ch 8: Waking up to rest in nightmare pt2

**A/N: I'm completely bored, so I thought I could use my bored time to come up with another chapter ^^ Hope you all like it XD.**

**Thank you all for the reviews, favorites and alerts; I hope I don't disappoint you, EVER!**

Chapter 8: Waking up to rest in nightmare pt 2

Still holding hands, Shizuo and Izaya along with Mairu made their way to the room upfront. Mairu, raising her little hand a little knocked a couple of times… and there was no answer.

"Kururi?" she called as she leaned against the door and then knocking again.

_**It's useless… she's not going to open that door… ever **_Izaya thought as his eyes started to sting but he bit the inside of his left cheek to hold the building up tears back.

"Kururi?" she called once again, but there was still no response from the other sibling.

Turning the knob, Mairu pushed the door slowly…

"Kururi? You still asleep?" she asked quietly making her way towards the bed, where their sister laid "sleeping" peacefully , but only Izaya knew that her slumber would be for the rest of the eternity.

He could only watch as his sister shook the other one gently but firmly, not noticing how he suddenly started squeezing Shizuo's hand.

"…Izaya?" he asked in concern, but the informant just took in a shaky breath, as it all started…

"K-Kururi! Kururi! Shinra, Shinra she's not breathing!" yelled Mairu as she leaned over her sister's face.

Of course, since Shinra had just been leaning against the doorframe he quickly made his way to the bed, asking for Mairu to step away quickly so he could work.

_**It's too late for that… don't you get it? She's gone… she-**_ Izaya stopped his own thoughts as a tear, unnoticed by anyone in the room, escaped his eyelid.

He didn't know why or when… but he started going towards the bed, letting go of Shizuo's hand, which started after him with a confused and worried look on his face.

Izaya walked holding his frail frame with his left hand against the wall, and then stumbled as he let go and held onto the end of the bed. He stared at his sister, who laid there limply as Shinra did CPR on her… he got up on the bed and crawled behind his sister. He lay down next to her and, using his little strength, reached for her, known by only him, for now, lifeless body… making Shinra stop with his useless attempts.

He slipped one of his arms around her little waist, and another on the back of her head hugging her close.

"Izaya…" started Shinra, but he didn't need to hear it… he had already known.

"Shinra-kun?" asked Mairu as her brown orbs went wide and teary as she shook her head; she took one unsteady step back as a small gasp escaped her lips.

"…she's gone, Shinra…" whispered Izaya, making everyone in the room look directly at him…

"…She died last night… she said goodbye to me while I slept… how could you not notice?" he whispered, as he shut his eyes tightly, tears running down his pale cheeks and onto Kururi's hair.

Everyone in the room was shocked, period. Celty just stood there, not being able to compose anything on her PDA. Shinra felt a strange agony building up his chest… he had lost a patient, Izaya's sister had died under his watch, and even though he knew her stated wasn't the best, he never thought that she would give up, and now he was kneeling hugging Mairu.

The other twin had fallen to her knees, her agonized sobs filling the room as she cried against the doctor's chest. Shizuo's eyes were wide, never looking away from Izaya… his body shook as he sobbed and snuggled closer to the corpse…

_Izaya…who was the heartless bastard… tell me and I'll kill him right now… I had never seen you like this, but I hate it… you've never looked so vulnerable in your whole life… I hate seeing you cry it makes me want to run and hug you closer to me… to tell you that you won't suffer anymore, that I would relieve the pain your heart is in at the moment… but-_

Shizuo slowly started walking to the bed, when he reached it… he look down at the informant, who had stopped crying and now just started to let go of his sibling, but not before he gave her cold forehead a gently goodbye kiss…

"Izaya…" called Shizuo, the informant sat up with the little strength that he hand and looked up at the "monster" of Ikebukuro.

Leaning down, Shizuo scooped Izaya up in his arms carrying him bridal style once again… the informant leaned closer to the warm chest and shakily sighed…

_**I hadn't felt this sort of warmth for a very long time…to be this close to the one I …yes, that's it I'll just accept it… Shizuo Heiwajima is the one I love… but he has always hated me, but… why is he here then? Could it be possible? Ugh, Shizu-chan~ so unpredictable this last few days… how troublesome, ne~... I love you so much, Shizu-chan… but I'm scared**_

Shizuo had entered the room Izaya was supposed to be in, and just when he laid the informant on the bed and was about to let go of him… Izaya pulled him down next to him…

Shizuo's eyes went wide in both confusion and shock for the sudden movement… he knew Izaya had always been fast, but wow…

He looked to his side at the informant and grinned a little when he saw the slowly increasing blush on his cheeks as he held onto the ex-bartenders hand once again…

"…stay" was all Izaya managed to whisper… he felt nervous and somewhat happy to have him right there next to him…

_**Damn me and my blushes! I'm so freaking nervous I mean… he's like inches away from me, I know that I've been jumpy this last few days… but knowing that it's Shizuo who is lying next to me gives me some sort of… comfort and relieve… it makes me feel… safe**_

"…why?" Shizuo whispered back.

_Why? What do you mean "why"? He's asking you to stay, idiot! To stay here… next to him… so you can keep him warm and safe in your arms… ok, he didn't say that… but I want to, yet I don't want to scare him even further… so I won't-_

"Baka… because I need you" after saying this Izaya couldn't help but turn his head away… the blush on his face was so dark that there was no difference between a tomato and his head… and of course, Shizuo just found his actions cute.

Chuckling, Shizuo softly held Izaya's chin and turned him back towards him… and if possible, Izaya's face got even redder.

"…May I?" Shizuo asked softly as he gently took a hold of Izaya's, now, bony waist… hugging him close, just as he had done with his sister.

They lay there for what seemed to be an eternity… but they didn't mind, they had each other and secretly… that's all they needed.

"…Shizu-chan~" called Izaya with a hint of his usual tone…

"Yeah, _flea_?" he answered back, not knowing how they smiled at the same time.

"…I don't think I actually ever hated you" he confessed in a soft whisper as he fell asleep in his dear, loved Shizu-chan's arms…

Noticing how _his_ little flea fell asleep from clear exhaustion and stress after having to say goodbye, he chuckled bringing the other closer… 

"…same here… Izaya" he whispered as he ran his fingers through the brunet's hair, wondering what his reaction would be when he found out who had done this… he was starting to suspect from Izaya's boss, Shiki… why? Izaya had been whimpering something similar to that name while he was being patched up, or so Shinra told him after the news… of what had happened to him.

He gritted his teeth in anger…there would be hell to pay, and it wouldn't be pretty.

_I'll protect you, Izaya… he won't lay a finger on one of your precious hairs ever again… I promise_


	9. Chapter 9: Followed and stared at

'**Kay, guys here's chapter 9 ^^ XD Hope you enjoy~ Happy New Year~~!**

Chapter 9: Followed and stared at

_3 months later…_

~Izaya's Pov~

It's been a few months since the incident… I am feeling much better now but Shinra won't let me go home yet, how rude, ne~… Last night, Shizu-chan told me that I was slowly coming back to the old me… I had stopped laughing at his blushing face when I cuddled next to him teasing him with a "nervous, ne? Shizu-chan~~"…

When I asked him if that annoyed him… he said no. he had looked into my eyes and said that he was glad that my old self was coming back.

Yes, I was quite confused at first but chose to stay quiet and enjoy the moment as we watched TV in the living room while I'm still hooked up to an IV.

When the clock stroke 11:00 p.m. he had to leave and I agreed… I mean, he has to get his sleep right?

But, last night… he surprised me. Instead of giving me the usual goodbye kiss on the forehead, he leaned down and before I could even blink gave me a quick little kiss on the cheek… leaving me all red as I sat on the edge of the bed looking at the door which had slammed closed as the blond nearly ran out of the room.

Now, I'm going to be honest with all of you… the only thing that came out from my lips, after I turned off the lamp and turned to my side after going under the sheets was:

"I love you, Shizu-chan~" and then I fell into a peaceful sleep, no nightmares about that night…

~Normal Pov, Next Day~

"Well, Izaya… I haven't told Shizuo yet, but I'm letting you go today… you're not on a "totally" healthy weight yet, so… you promise you'll eat as a normal person, no starving yourself?" asked Shinra as he took out the IV from the informants arm as gently as he could.

Izaya winced a little when it came out and then he looked up at the doctor. "I promise, it wasn't fun… I mean the feeling of…." He shivered. "Uh… it was actually kind of painful… but, I just couldn't bring myself to move, I thought that if I moved… he would hear me and come back for more… "Fun"… I was just scared…" he whispered and bit his lip trying not to tear up, which worked perfectly. 

Shinra put a reassuring hand on his friend's shoulder and gave it a little squeeze, just as Celty had done to him, just to let him know he was there.

"Good, now… I want you to go straight home, take a well deserved shower, not that you haven't done it here, right? Jajaja, just so you feel home again… know what I mean? And then, wait until Shizuo gets there because… I am going to be nice enough as to call him and tell him to pick up some fatty tuna for the patient" he teased, knowing that his two friends were slowly turning into a pair of love birdies.

Izaya blushed brightly and then turned his head away standing up. "Yeah… um, I think I'll do that… goodbye, Shinra… thank you for everything and for taking care of my sisters… I don't even know how to thank you…" and with that, Izaya smiled at the underground doctor and went to the door and outside to the busy streets of Ikebukuro.

The first thing he did was take in the deepest breath he could manage, it was good to be out again… yeah, Shizu-chan had helped him out to the balcony a couple of weeks ago but… this just felt much better.

The only thing that could make this even better was Shizu-chan. It would be nice if he were able to be with him right now…

As he walked down the street, a shiver suddenly went down his spine… accompanied by the feeling that he was being watched.

He frowned at the idea… and kept walking but, his body tensed when he heard a different type of footsteps behind him… he had heard those before. And as he thought back, he couldn't help but shiver once again as he remembered that those shoes sounded like Shiki's men's… and he proved himself right, when he slightly looked over his shoulder.

He kept walking normally… knowing that if he started walking faster or if he ran, they would know and it would get bad.

But… if Shiki's body guards where around… didn't that mean that the aging man was somewhere near? Izaya's breath hitched at the thought but he just kept on walking… he had to keep walking.

Soon enough, he was just a couple of minutes away from his apartment…he knew there was a lot of cleaning to do, but he had to so it sooner or later right?

Finally, he found himself in front of his apartment building… he didn't stop to stare around him; he went straight to the elevator, too scared to take the always empty stairs. He stepped out from it and quickly went to his door unlocking it and going in.

He put on every lock that his door had and tried to keep his calm when he hear two very well known voices coming from the hall outside his apartment.

"Little ass went in…" one of them said.

"Well, now we know he's back at home" and with that they disappeared.

_**Damn it… a-are they going to tell S-Shiki? Shit… ok, calm down Izaya… go take a shower and wait for Shizu-chan… breathe you're fine, just don't open that door… relax**_

The informant shook his head and went directly to his bedroom; he checked his drawers and took out some clothes then went straight to the shower.

He let the water run down his body and felt his nerves relax…he closed his eyes taking in the fragrance of his shower gel… he stood there, for God only know how long and then turned the water off.

The cold air hit him quickly as he wrapped his body with a white towel. He dried off and the dressed, he would normally do that in his bedroom but, the feeling of being watched was just freaking him out.

He then went to the kitchen and grabbed a can of soup; it was lunch time and well… Shinra said not to starve himself, right? Plus, Shizu-chan was coming for dinner that was for sure.

After heating it up, he went to the table and slowly ate it. He prepared himself a cup of tea and as he drank it he was going to sit on the couch but noticed how it was still the same way he had left it… he sighed and decided to sit on the other end.

He calmly drank his tea, and then felt the sudden need to look out his window… he slowly put his cup down and cautiously went to the window.

His blood turned cold as he looked down… his eyes widened in fear, a violent shiver went down his back and a quiet gasp escaped his lips.

There on the sidewalk where that old man had been killed stood Shiki…looking at him like some sort of maniac, wide sick smirk on his face… amused look in his eyes.

Izaya's body shook in fear…he didn't dare look away, he wouldn't even blink, knowing that those horrible eyes would still be on him… something inside him screamed at him to call Shizuo but… what would he be able to do?

_**Yeah, Shizu-chan is strong… but he's still as human as anybody else… I just wouldn't be able to live if something were to happen to him… I just love him too much…**_

Snapping away from his thoughts, the brunet looked down once again to see that he was still there… but what he mouthed was what made a strangled, fearful gasp escape the bottom of hit throat…

"You're mine…" and with that he disappeared into the shadows of a nearby alley.

**LG15: Hmm, I think I twisted the story a little with this chapter… anyways, did you like it? Really hope you did! ^^ Thanks for your reviews and I'll write you guys soon (Pardon any mistakes, I speak Spanish and am trying to improve in English xD)**


	10. Chapter 10: Stalker pt 1

**LG15: I hope you can forgive me for the late update -_-'I'm so sorry, school's starts tomorrow so… I will try my best to keep on decent updates **

Chapter 10: Stalker

Izaya wasn't able to move afterwards. He just stared, unable to blink, at the spot where that _man_ had disappeared. His hand rested against the window's glass, shaking somewhat violently as if slowly formed a fist. He pressed his head against the glass too, shutting his eyes as he shook it…

No, he couldn't break down… not after all of his efforts, not after everything Shizuo had done for him… he just couldn't, he had to be strong!

He struggled to keep his breathing steady, over the last few weeks at Shinra's he'd been having panic attacks when he was touched… but, Shizuo was always there to try and calm him down, meaning they had only used medication on him a couple of times

He opened his eyes and looked down once again taking in short breaths. He was so focused on a certain spot on the sidewalk that he nearly jumped out of his skin when the phone rang.

He sighed heavily thinking that he was being way too paranoid and went to pick up the phone.

"Hello?"

_Hey, flea… Shinra just told me he let you out today… are you feeling ok? You're voice sounds kind of shaky _

"Oh, hello Shizu-chan~… yes, I am fine thank you for your concern~~!" he tried his best to put on his old annoying voice; he was really starting to feel like a burden to him with all of his problems so… why add another one?

There was a sudden moment of silence between them… Izaya actually thought he had hung but then the informant heard him chuckle, his eyebrow rose slightly but at the same time a small smile formed in his lips as he went and sat behind his desk.

… _You're lying_ he said with a determined tone.

"No really, it's nothing~" he said trying to sound convincing, but it was not enough.

_Izaya, you know you can tell me anything… you can trust me… we're friends, remember? _His tone was calm… almost sweet, but serious all at the same time.

"I don't want to discuss with you, Shizu-chan~ See you soon, alright~?" he asked, quickly trying to change the subject.

Izaya heard him sigh almost in frustration but he took a deep breath and then answered back:

_Fine… I just got out from work, I'll go to Russia Sushi and then I'll head to your apartment, ok?_

"Sure, see you soon, protozoan~!" with that Izaya hung up, looking straight at the ceiling… he felt nervous, and come on, who wouldn't be?

Only now did he notice that he had started shaking again, he took long, deep breaths trying to get a hold of himself…

_**Come on, Izaya… he won't come up here… right? Ugh, come on try to keep calm… nothing is going to happen, alright? Shizu-chan is coming soon. Whatever you do, again, DO NOT OPEN THAT DOOR… Shizu-chan will protect you…he promised, remember? **_

Izaya gave out a startled gasp when the phone suddenly rang again; he pressed the talk button and brought it up to his ear, thinking it was Shizuo again… I mean, who else could be calling?

"Yes, what is it, Shizu-chan~?" he asked

…

"Shizu-chan?" now that was weird…

…

A dark, amused chuckled came from the other end…

…_Scared, Orihara-san? How amusing, you have never looked more pathetic in your entire life! What happened to your pride, Hm? Got shaken? How sad…_

Izaya just closed his eyes and then tried his best to answer, he opened his mouth and then closed it again not really knowing what to say… he thought that what he had said was true and it angered him. He felt weak, useless… ashamed of his person. He had always been nonchalant about everything around him and completely self-confident. Now, he was the opposite…

'_Mouse got your tongue? I just wanted to tell you that just because you have that monster at your side does not mean that I won't be coming back for play time, alright?' _

_~Izaya's Pov~_

"Shiki… he is _not_ a monster…" I gritted my teeth, as I nearly growled at him… I felt a sudden rage running through my veins… it felt wrong to hear him call… _theloveofmylife_ a monster…

'_But, of course he is… he throws vending machines, you idiot! He doesn't have control of that monstrous strength! He has hurt people, and what does he do about it? Nothing… just like the good for nothing that he is… and-'_

"DAMN IT SHUT UP! WHAT DO YOU KNOW ABOUT HIM! TELL ME! DO YOU HAVE A CLUE OF WHO IS HEIWAJIMA SHIZUO? TELL ME, GODDAMNIT!" I yelled standing up from my chair, not realizing that my apartment door had opened… only to reveal a wide eyed Shizu-chan…

**LG15: it was kind of shitty, wasn't it? That was part one, I divided it cuz right now… my school, let's just say they made some changes and I'm really not in the mood so… I promise the next part will be up before next week, can forgive me for the crappy chapter? **


	11. Chapter 11: Stalker pt 2

**LG15: I just noticed that in the last chapter I typed "chuckled" instead of "chuckle"… sorry about that, that was very stupid -_-'. Yeah, so I said the chapter would be up sometime before next week… but I have nothing to do and I just finished exercising so… why not write another chapter? Yay, first time I ever update two times in one day it feels so… exciting *-* Lol, I'm sorry! Enough of my shitty stuff, on with the chapter, which will hopefully make up for the last one which I believe sucked D:**

Chapter 11: Stalker pt 2

_What is going on here? Why is Izaya yelling? Who is he talking to? Ugh, so many questions and no answers… he said my name but… why did he sound so angry? _

Shizuo quietly stepped further into the apartment, knowing that Izaya had not noticed his entrance, he didn't want to startle him… he already looked quite agitated if you asked him.

He stopped a few steps away from the informant's desk listening to his sudden outrage.

"WELL LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT HIM! HE IS THE MOST AMAZING PERSON I'VE KNOWN IN MY WHOLE LIFE! H-HE HATES ME, YET HE WAS RIGHT THERE BESIDE ME WHEN I NEEDED SOMEONE THE MOST! YOU KILLED MY PARENTS, MY SISTERS…. And you fucked the living shit out of me!" Izaya's eyes got glazed over by unwanted tears of rage and sadness, his breathing was fast and his grip on the phone was strong as if he wanted to break it in half.

"Yet, here you are saying that you still aren't done with me! What else can you take away from me, huh? You took away my happiness; my reasons to be… you shattered my pride until it turned into nothing… I have nothing else left, Shiki! Shizuo, yes he has made mistakes in his life, like any other being! Even I, that considered me to be a god, have made mistakes in my life… all of us have and you know what I regret the most right now. I didn't realize my family was so important to me until some time ago… how precious they were to me… I regret ever meeting with you, I should've listened to my father… you were nothing but bad news for my life! And what I regret the most? I regret that I didn't try to fix my relationship with Shizu-chan is highshool… because if I had, I would've realized just how great he is…"

_Shiki...SHIKI! That fucking bastard! I knew it, damn it! That fucking asshole is going to pay for everything he did to Izaya… I swear he will! How dare he even call here? I don't know what I'll do if I encounter him… but, there's going to be hell to pay… no one dares to hurt Izaya… NO _ONE

Shizuo clenched his fists as he stared at him… he wanted to go and comfort the informant so badly… he was shocked to be hearing this from Izaya Orihara's lips and could see how much he was hurting but… felt that the informant needed to get everything out of his chest…

The ex-bartender felt…something inside of him, yelling no… screaming at him to take that phone and say a couple of things to that bastard, but he had to keep control… though it was getting harder by the second as Izaya let out everything that hadn't been able to at Shinra's.

"Monster? HE'S NOT A MONSTER SHIKI, YOU ARE!" and with that, Izaya pressed the 'end' button and threw the phone across the room.

He didn't know what to do… what to think. He knew he had done something risky… but, he just couldn't take it anymore. Everything that was making his chest felt tight just… went out. And he needed to defend Shizuo… he knew it was totally out of character for him to do that but… he just did.

"Izaya…"

"AH! Damn it, Shizu-chan! You scared the hell out of me!" he yelled as he held onto his chest, feeling his heart bump hard against his chest.

"Sorry... who the hell was that? It was Shiki, wasn't it? He did this to you…"

_**H-he heard…shoot, earth… please swallow me, onegai~? **_

A light blush took over the informant's cheeks as a couple of tears escaped his lids and he hung his head trying to hide it.

"Why deny it? You heard everything, didn't you?" Izaya asked in a barely audible whisper as he sniffed starting to walk out but a hand held onto his arm, stopping him.

"Don't go away, Izaya… Don't… we're in this together; don't just walk away as if I were leaving you! I promised you that I would protect you… and I will… if that bastard ever dares to lay a finger on you again… I-I don't know what I'm capable of doing… you know I have issues with my anger and I won't hesitate… never" said Shizuo as they stared into each other's eyes.

"I know you did, Shizu-chan… but, I-I'm scared" Izaya let the blonde hug him and now cried silently against his chest.

They stood there for a couple of minutes and then Izaya looked at the clock…

"Shizu-chan… can you take that to the fridge? I lost my appetite; I just want to go to bed…" Izaya said as he stared at the bag from Russia Sushi.

"Sure…" after doing that, Shizuo went to Izaya's room and sat next to him.

"Shizu-chan?" asked Izaya.

"What is it?"

"Can… can you hold me just like you did… that night?" Izaya finally spilled it out as his cheeks fired up and, of course, Shizuo saw that…

The blonde couldn't help but laugh at his little, secretly, flea's cuteness. He nodded and then lay down next to him…. Taking a hold of his waist and then gently placing his other hand over the brunet's hair, holding him close.

"Like this?" he asked as he smiled down at Izaya, who cuddled against his chest.

Izaya nodded in response just as his phone vibrated, letting him know that he had a new message… he opened it as he could and tried to ignore what he had just read closing it and then falling asleep as he listened to the steady beats of Shizu-chan's heart…

The message had read:

We'll be together really soon… my little raven

**A/N: Yes, there will be another part and Shiki will get more creepier than I already imagine him ^^ **


	12. Chapter 12: Stalker pt 3

**Lg15: Sorry for the late update, I don't think this chapter is good enough, but I'll make up for it when the moment that I've been waiting for comes XD You'll see, thanks for reading!**

Chapter 12: Stalker pt 3

~The next day~

Izaya wasn't able to sleep, period. There were, once again, dark bags under his crimson orbs as he had spent the night just staring at the wall while he was held by a sleeping Shizuo.

He couldn't help but feel terrified, the feeling of being touched once again by those repulsive hands was just… unpleasant, nauseating… he just couldn't quite describe what he felt.

He shivered as he snuggled a little closer to the tall man. He knew he would be getting up soon and leave for work… but a side of him wanted to make him stay.

He felt the hold on his body tighten a little bit and looked up just in time to see Shizuo's yellowish brown eyes open as he blinked the sleep out of them.

"Izaya… what are you doing up?" he asked as they both sat up.

Izaya, knowing that when the blond came to all his senses he would notice his lack of sleep, looked down.

"I don't feel like sleeping any longer…" he lied.

Shizuo stared at him for a couple of minutes. Then, letting out a deep sigh, he reached for Izaya's face and held it.

They both stared into each other's eyes, lost in their own thoughts.

"You didn't sleep at all… did you?" murmured Shizuo.

Sighting in defeat, Izaya just nodded his head… until the question he didn't want to hear came from the blonde's lips.

"Why?"

_**Oh, nothing is just Shiki-san sent me an indirect menace! **_

"Nothing important… I was just thinking"

_**Lie…**_

"About what?" Shizuo insisted.

_**Why do you have to be so persistent Shizu-chan…?**_

"About… how late you'll be for work if you don't go right now" he said as he looked at the clock.

_**Lie**_

"Seriously, Izaya… you thought I would be going to work today? I'm not leaving you here" Shizuo said with a determined tone.

"But, I want you to go and work~! I'll be fine, Shizu-chan~!" he "smiled" as the blonde hesitantly started getting up.

_**LIE! **_

"We're not done with this, Izaya…" Shizuo said as he walked towards the brunet and gave him the usual goodbye kiss on the forehead… and finally went out of the apartment, leaving our dear informant all by himself.

After that, Izaya was met by the eternal silence that flooded his apartment. He looked around his bedroom before sighing and getting up to take a much needed shower.

He grabbed a towel and pair of pants along with a t-shirt before going into the bathroom where he locked the door with a soft click.

He removed his clothes and turned on the shower waiting for it to warm up.

While that happened, he began to think again. He wouldn't ask himself, like in those movies or novels, what the hell Shiki meant by that text… it was perfectly clear.

He wasn't sure if he should've told Shizuo about it, but then again… he didn't like the fact that he was, unconsciously, dragging Shizuo into something that he wasn't sure how it would end.

Finally, he went in and let the water calm his tense muscles… he closed his eyes and breathed deeply.

Once he finished, he dried off and put the clothes on. He went to the kitchen and started preparing some tea when his phone beeped twice, letting him know that he had two new messages.

He went to the counter and opened it, the first one was from a private number… he hesitated to open it, but then thought that it could be a new client, though he hadn't been working at all in the past few months.

The message read:

How stupid… to leave his dear little princess all alone… you won't have to bear with that anymore soon my darling… I will NEVER let you go, that is a promise… 

Izaya's eyes were wide as he swallowed feeling his body shake. He opened the next message and noticed it was from Shizuo.

You didn't tell me what happened but, if anything happens or if you need someone to talk to… call me, ok? I need you to trust me, we're friends remember? Eat something, See you after work.

_**Friends… and that's all we'll ever be, ne Shizu-chan? I love you very much but… I'm not willing to keep dragging you into this any longer.**_

He had decided to end it… he pressed the end button so he would be able to dial a number.

The other line rang a couple of times before the person finally picked up…

'_Ah, Izaya… how nice of you to call me' _the voice on the other end mocked.

"…I'm tired of this; let's just end it… alright?" Izaya murmured as he let himself fall onto the couch.

'_Hm… and what exactly do you mean by tha_t, _Hm~?'_

Silently sighing, Izaya said the words that he knew he wouldn't be able to take back…

"I mean that I… I surrender; do whatever you want with me… I'm an informant and I know you, I'm sure your planning to do something with Shizu-chan… and I can't let him get hurt because of me… so just, take me and please leave him alone" he said his voice shaking.

'_Ah, as expected from you… well, yes… I had been planning on something to get that idiot away from you but, now that you offer… that won't be necessary, will it?' _The excitement in Shiki's voice was evident, he even sounded as if he were talking of a belonging… but what did it matter now?

"No… where should I meet you?"

'_Don't worry, Orihara-san~… I'll come and get you when you least expect it… sayonara, my raven'_

The line went dead and Izaya stared at the ceiling… only one thing going through his mind:

_**This is the end… isn't it?**_


	13. Chapter 13: Stalker pt 4

**LG15: Sorry for the lateness and for the last chapter… I can't believe I made Izaya give up so easily, but I got an idea to fix the situation and bring up some more suspense! I hope you may forgive me D:**

Chapter 13: Stalker pt 4

Izaya stared at the ceiling once again deep in thought… why … why had he given up so easily? It was stupid… sure, he really didn't want Shiki to plan anything against Shizuo but… now Shizuo would get really, REALLY furious when or if he found out.

_**I'm such a coward… I gave into him so quickly I can't even believe it. I don't want him to take me away from Shizuo… and I don't want Shizuo to be mad at me, I didn't want to add anything else to my list of problems and look what I did… why am I such an idiot?**_

He angrily pulled at his hair as he groaned if frustration before sitting up and sigh deeply as he closed his eyes.

_**Stupid, stupid, stupid!**_

The doorbell rang making Izaya slightly jump. He stared at the door for a moment with wide eyes; he shakily stood up not taking his eyes off it as he started walking.

He thought at all the reasons he had to not open it but still kept walking. He stood in front of it as it kept ringing… the noise echoing loudly against his eardrums.

After a moment of thinking he decided not to open until the smell of smoke came up his nostrils…

_**Ah…it's just Shizu-chan…**_

Izaya grinned a little as he reached for the door knob and started turning it… but a memory came flashing over him.

_Izaya sat in his bed at Shinra's eating a little bowl of soup that he had been forced to eat. Shizuo sat beside him, making sure he would finish it up._

_When he was almost done, Izaya looked up at the blond a curious expression on his pale face._

"_Um…Shizu-chan?" he asked._

"_What?"_

"…_I haven't seen you smoke in a while… why? I thought it calmed you down"_

"_Well… exactly, I don't get furious anymore so…actually, you don't get on my nerves either so, why keep doing it? And if I want to help take care of you, I can't really mess up your lungs right?" smiled the blond as the brunet slightly pouted._

"_You don't need to help take care of me… Shinra and Celty are more than capable of doing so" he said as he finished up his soup._

"_Well, too bad… because I want to"_

Izaya gasped as he finished turning the knob and opening the door a little.

_**The only person that smokes is… DAMN IT!  
><strong>_

He was just about to close the door when a shoe came in the way…

"Damn! Go away!" he yelled as he pushed against the door with all of his might.

"You made an agreement with me, Orihara-san. Feeling regretful, we just talked! And I said it would be when you least expected it, and here I am… now, get out of the way, Orihara-san" Shiki's voice sounded amused… it gave Izaya the chills as he kept on pushing.

"…" he didn't say anything…he knew what he had gotten himself into but… was he actually prepared? Of course not!

_**SO DAMN STUPID!**_

"Let me in, Orihara-san…" hissed Shiki through the open space that left the door, while Izaya kept struggling to keep it "closed".

Just then, again, the phone rang. Izaya looked towards it, then back to the door again… and ran. He didn't look back when he heard the door slam open, he didn't look back when he heard Shiki's insane laughter… he didn't bother looking back when he felt a hand on his shoulder he just pushed the other man and kept reaching for the phone and once he pressed the 'talk' button, a hand pulled at his foot making him wince as he fell to the floor with a loud and painful thud.

Shiki took the opportunity to climb on top of him, not noticing the call was already connected. Izaya gasped at this and tried to shove him off but, trying to keep the phone in his hand it was impossible.

'_Izaya?'_

Shiki's hands made their way to Izaya's thin neck and started strangling him. The informant had heard his name come from the phone, but hadn't had the chance to answer back too busy keeping his eyes on his stalker.

"You know… I've always thought red really suits you… it's the color of your eyes and along with your pale skin it is just wonderful…. You wouldn't mind if I fixed you up a little, Hm?" Shiki bent down a little lower and took a deep breath on Izaya's hair. "Delightful…"

'_Izaya! Who the hell is that? Come on, answer me!'_

Izaya desperately gasped for air as he tried to reach for his dear blade, which rested peacefully inside his pocket.

"What are you looking for? Ah, perfect" he said as he reached for Izaya's blade. He flicked it open and licked it as he smirked at the chocking sounds that emerged from Izaya.

"Oh, sorry… I forgot you couldn't breathe" he said sarcastically as he released the brunet, who instantly started coughing trying to catch his breath, which was kind of difficult with the weight of the other over him.

'_Izaya, what's going on? Come on, your scaring me!' _

Izaya's head snapped towards the phone. "Sh-Shinra…" he managed to call before Shiki grabbed the phone and threw it against the near wall, making it crush into pieces.

"How mean of you, Izaya-kun… talking on the phone while you have a guest over, tch" Shiki was moving the blade around dangerously close and after a minute or so of doing that, he placed it against Izaya's neck.

"Suddenly… I feel like drawing, don't you agree?" he smirked at Izaya's shocked face as he pressed a little harder and the first drop of blood made its way down his pale neck.

"S-Shiki… d-don't" he pleaded as a violent shiver ran down his spine.

But, of course, like the maniac he is, he kept on going each pained groan exciting him even more. When he finished, Izaya's neck was covered in blood as well as his white t-shirt, he was shivering and silent, terrified tears streamed down his face as he looked at his "boss" with wide eyes.

"…You look beautiful, my little raven" he finished saying this as he licked the blood from the blade with a longing look, nearly eating Izaya with his eyes.

"See you soon…" he bent down and pulled Izaya by the hair towards him when he tried to get away from him, giving him a kiss on his cheek to proceed and once again breathe in his scent…

After what felt like eternity to Izaya, Shiki left after throwing Izaya's blade next to him. The informant let out a pained whimper as he reached for his bleeding neck, he tried to get on his knees and looked at the floor… as expected there was a little puddle of blood over it.

He stood up and stumbled to the bathroom where he suddenly felt sick and puked everything he had in his stomach including some blood.

He couldn't believe how sick that man really was… his little obsession over him was really blood chilling… the way he… smelled him and how he touched him…

After flushing the toilet Izaya sat against the wall shaking, holding onto his neck as he whimpered. He shook his head in fear as he looked around the bathroom completely out of it.

He started crying again… he just couldn't help it, he started feeling dizzy with all of the stress and the smell of his own blood was making him nauseous again so he just let his body fall to the side and after a couple of minutes he went unconscious.

~Shizuo's point of view~

Finally, Tom and I were done with today's collects. After saying goodbye, I headed for Shinjuku… I walked as fast as I could… something had happened that much I knew. Izaya had looked very intrigued this morning… almost scared.

I got there quicker than I thought, I entered the building and took the stairs, too worried to wait for the elevator.

I made my way towards Izaya's door and rang the bell. I gave him a couple of minutes to come and greet me with his annoyingly (and cute) voice… but he didn't.

I frowned at this; I rang the bell again… nothing. I knocked a couple of times, but still there was nothing.

I knew he hadn't gone out today, he would've said something. I went to the little tree that was a couple of feet away from the door and looked for the spare key Izaya had hidden for me.

I unlocked the door and opened it slowly; it was getting dark inside the apartment so I reached for the switch and turned on the light.

I wished I hadn't… the first thing that came to view was a puddle of blood that laid near the wall, where the pieces of what seemed to be Izaya's phone laid too.

~Normal Pov~

With wide eyes, he stepped closer… next to the puddle was Izaya's switchblade, blood stains messing up its once shiny silvery look.

"Izaya!" he called; there was still no response so he took out his phone. Shinra had called earlier asking for Izaya, but he had told him he was working so Shinra told him he would call the raven to his phone… which was now in pieces… maybe he knew where he was?

He pressed the phone to his ear waiting for the underground doctor to answer as he walked towards the bedroom.

'_Damn it, Shizuo! I've been trying to reach you for hours!' _snapped the doctor as he answered.

"That doesn't matter; do you know where Izaya is? Did he tell you he was going out or something?"

'_Listen to me, damn it! That's why I've been trying to call you! I called but when he answered he didn't talk to me, I just heard another voice saying some stuff about how good he thought he looked in red… then I heard Izaya gasping for air… and…. And then he called for me… but then I heard the phone crashing against something and the line went dead…' _Shinra said, ending with a big deep breath.

Just as he finished saying this, Shizuo reached the bedroom and froze when he saw the bathroom door open.

"..What?" he managed to whisper as he slowly approached the door.

'_Yes, Shizuo! I'm sick worried, you say he's not in the apartment?' _the doctor asked in a worried tone.

"Shinra… come over, NOW!" the blonde yelled as he looked inside the bathroom.

'_What, why? What happened!'_

"Izaya…" Shizuo hung up and ran, kneeling beside the informant and held him against his chest in a sitting position, his head against his shoulder."

"Izaya… hey, come on wake up, Izaya!" he shook the other gently and then noticed his bleeding neck.

He bent Izaya's head a little, gasping as he saw what was causing the bleeding. Carved against Izaya's neck were three simple, yet menacing words…

'You are mine'


	14. Chapter 14: Said and Done pt 1

**Lg15: Sorry for the lateness, my dear readers ^^. Thank you so much for all of your review, alerts and favs. They all make me smile like an idiot while I read them all alone in my room XD. By the way, just so you don't get all confused on me… Izaya's been receiving texts to several of his phones ^^**

Chapter 14: Said and Done

Izaya woke up a couple of hours later, somewhere around 12:45 a.m. He winced as he sat up and tried to look to the side, where from the corner of his eye, he noticed Shizuo's head resting against his bed.

As he turned to look at him, the last events came rushing to his head and he couldn't help but reach for his neck, where a soft bandage rested around it.

Trying not to wake Shizuo, he climbed of the bed carefully, trying not to fall as a little slight wave of dizziness hit him, and making his way to the small bathroom he had grown attached to in the last few months. He didn't need his smart senses to know he was a Shinra's from the second he opened his eyes.

He turned on the light and looked at his reflection. Without even thinking about it, he started taking off the soft cloth around his neck.

A light gasp escaped his lips and a shiver ran down his spine as he slowly caressed the painfully earned scar, which read: You are mine.

He turned on the sink and splashed some water over his face, breathing deeply. He closed his eyes until he felt a familiar hand on his shoulder.

The brunet released a shaky breath and turned around looking at the serious looking doctor.

"Shinra…"he whispered.

"Izaya… I need to talk to you, please" he said softly, but Izaya saw a glint of anger in his eyes.

He managed to nod silently and they both exited the room silently, leaving behind a sleeping Shizuo.

~Shinra's Living Room~

Celty was waiting for them, sitting on the couch. There was a cup of tea on the little table and the air around them was tense, Izaya could tell by how the headless rider's body was positioned. She looked sort of pissed.

"Sit down, Izaya" said Shinra.

Izaya obeyed not taking his eyes off the shadows coming out of Celty's neck, which were acting just like her mood, where her head should've been.

"Izaya… what were you thinking?"Asked Shinra as he sat down beside him, Izaya tilted his head in honest confusion.

"What are you talking about?"

Celty jumped up from the couch and angrily threw something at the informant as hard as she could, it hit Izaya's chest, and ended up in the informant's lap… it was his phone.

"It's my phone… what does it had to do with-?"He cut himself off as he opened it and saw what was open.

'_Soon… soon we'll be together and nobody will ever separate us, my raven… Nobody will be able to find us, so you'll be safe. I can't wait to feel your skin against mine once more, and take in your smell…. It is obsessively intoxicating…'_

"Answer me, Izaya… don't just stare at the phone… answer me!"He nearly yelled, none of them hearing the door at the end of the hall opening.

"I didn't have a choice, ok! What I supposed to do!"Izaya burst out.

"Shizuo's been next to you since this… entire thing started! He's proven you that he cared for you, you can trust him and you know he had a right to know! Do you know how he looked when I went to save you just a couple of hours ago! You should've seen the look on his eyes as he held you!" yelled Shinra.

"… Tell me what?"A new voice came into the conversation.

_**Damn… he's going to leave me, I just know it! But… I can't keep hiding all of this from him; Shinra's right… is not fair.**_

Izaya slowly stood up, looking at the floor and walked towards the blonde… holding his phone out for him to take it. And he did.

Izaya bit his lip as Shizuo read and re-read the message, but he looked for other messages and read them all… breathing more and more heavily with each one that passed.

There was about two minutes of silence on the once peaceful living room until…

Growling loudly, Shizuo shut the phone and threw it against the wall, making it end up as the other one back at the brunet's apartment. In the blink of an eye and before either Celty or Shinra could react, Shizuo had Izaya against the wall.

"WHAT IS THE MATTER WITH YOU! WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME ABOUT THOSE FUCKING TEXT MESSAGES!" he yelled making Izaya wince.

"…"

"ANSWER ME, DAMN IT!"

"I was scared…"

"SCARED? SCARED OF WHAT? I TOLD YOU I WOULD PROTECT YOU FROM ANYTHING REMEMBER! HOW COULD YOU BE SO STUPID! THAT'S WHAT HAPPENED THAT NIGHT WASN'T IT? THAT'S WHY YOU WERE SO TENSE AND DIDN'T GET ANY SLEEP… WHY CAN'T YOU TRUST ME FOR ONCE IN YOUR LIFE! I'VE PROVEN YOU THAT YOU CAN, SO WHY DON'T YOU! SEE? I CAN'T EVEN BELIEVE I ACTUALLY THOUGHT I DIDN'T HATE YOU ANYMORE, BECAUSE YOU KNOW WHAT? I HATE YOU WITH ALL OF MY SOUL RIGHT NOW YOU FUCKING _**FLEA**_!"

Shizuo's words stung… they really did. Izaya's eyes were glazed over by tears, eyes as wide as they could go… a horrible feeling hitting his chest and stomach with full force.

_**Do you really mean that Shizu-chan? How can you still hate me, when I love you so much? Do you even realize what you just said? Were you just blinded by that rage I hadn't seen in your eyes for such a long time?**_

Izaya, not looking back as Shinra's hand tried to take a hold of his shoulder, walked towards the door… not bothering to burst back at him, why should he? That furious blond had unconsciously teached him how to feel… it was too bad that he hated him again though he knew he sort of deserve it.

As he turned the handle, Izaya looked slightly over his shoulder small smile on his lips as he locked his eyes with the blonde's.

"I was scared for you… Shizu-chan" he whispered and closed the door behind him, breaking into a run ignoring the stinging pain on his body and Shinra's calls.

**LG15: *hides under her bed* Jeje… sorry?**


	15. Chapter 15: Lullaby

**LG15: Hey, guys! I suggest (if you want to) that you listen to the song while you read it ^^ I love it and it sort of gives me the chills because it's like it's speaking to me… anyways, hope you enjoy the chapter: D Oh, the song is Lullaby by Nickelback.**

Chapter 15: Lullaby

_RING, RING, RING!_

How many times… the phone has rang ever since? How many times… has it been ignored?

_BEEP_

'Izaya? Come on, I know your there… I'm worried about you, it started raining horribly shortly after you ran off a couple of nights ago… did you make it home safely? Are you ok? Listen, I'm sure Shizuo didn't mean it; you should've seen the look on his eyes when he realized what he had done… he even went to look for you, he went to your apartment and you ignored him, he is worried sick… please just, call me alright? At least let us know you're alright'

The message ended, the words echoing through the silent apartment… where two figures were present.

One of them, sat on the couch… gaze lost somewhere in the wall, not really processing anything that happened around him. That's what was left of the great, Orihara Izaya. Nothing but what seemed to be a rag doll.

The other caressing every inch of the other's body… he gave kisses, and bites to the thin, marked as his, neck.

The informant's absent face, as well as his body, was covered in deep cuts and bruises from the first couple of nights, when he tried to fight for the remaining of his life.

Shiki had taken out all of his drunken, obsessive rage on the frail body next to him. He spent most of the day marking him, or tainting him with the "most precious" crimson. At night… let's just say, it hurt Izaya to move at all.

"Hm, I'll be back in a couple of hours, love" murmured Shiki as he kissed Izaya, hissing when he received no response.

The informant sat there, lost in his own world. He heard the door close and gave a silent sigh closing his eyes, tears falling down… but he couldn't feel them.

He didn't move but… the memory of Shizuo's desperate calls behind his door remained fresh and haunting in his aching head.

All of you out there must be wondering: what the hell happened?

_After Izaya ran off, he stopped soaking wet a couple of steps outside of his apartment. He was out of breath and shook uncontrollably. _

_He regretted going inside as soon as he locked the door behind him. First, he heard the deep breath someone took behind him; he felt the cold breath hitting his scalp._

_A violent shiver ran through his back as strong, possessive, obsessed arms took a hold of his trembling waist. Cold lips started kissing his neck, tongue licking at his collarbone._

_Izaya whimpered as he shook his head. This couldn't be happening… no, not now._

"_I told you we would be together really soon…" _

_BANG, BANG, BANG!_

"_Izaya? Damn it, open the door! I know you're in there, please, I'm sorry! You know I can't control myself, please forgive me!" the blonde yelled desperately behind the door._

_Izaya was about to answer but froze when Shiki pointed a gun at the door._

"_Hm… he's been shot before but, can he survive a shot to the head?" he smirked_

_**Can he? I don't know… I've always told him he's a monster, well… before all of this started but… Deep, really deep inside I've always know he is as human as anyone else…**_

"_D-Don't… please, don't shoot him" I whispered._

"_Then don't answer…" he hissed._

"_Izaya… I'm sorry" they both heard the blonde's slow steps disappear as he entered the elevator at the end of the hall._

"_Je… now then…"_

_Shiki pushed Izaya against the wall and roughly kissed him, the brunet tried to push him away and managed to do so._

_He tried to run towards his room, to lock himself in, but Shiki was faster. He grabbed Izaya by his hair and threw him at the big mirrored wall; a crack was heard as Izaya's head collided with the glass. A trail of blood started flowing down his face._

_Shiki grabbed him again and smashed his head against the other wall a couple of times, successfully making the informant dizzy, and unaware of his surroundings._

_He then pushed Izaya, making him fall over. He grabbed the informant's leg and started dragging him to the bedroom. Izaya desperately clawed at the floor trying as hard as he could to fight back, but the hits he received had really affected him._

_With no other choice, he gave up… Shiki picked him up and threw him to the bed, taking once again what wasn't meant to be his…_

Izaya's nails still had blood in them… his head still bled sometimes and what happened the first night, happened every night, each time worse than the last.

_BEEP_

Izaya slowly looked towards his side, somewhat surprised. He hadn't heard the phone ringing.

'Izaya…'

His eyes went slightly wide as he heard his voice, he hadn't been expecting him to even call.

'I think you've heard this like a thousand timed already but… I'm sorry. I can't believe I told you I hated you, because the truth is that I don't. You know… I found this song, I sent it to your email um, it reminded me of you and if you hear it… Hell, if you even hear this… I've wanted to tell you something for a very long time, but I hadn't had the guts to tell you…'

Izaya had slowly, as he was in pain, made his way to his desk. He opened his email and just as the blonde had stated, there was an email from him. He opened it and there was a link, he clicked on it and a player that said 'Lullaby- Nickelback' came in view.

_Well I know the feeling_

_Of finding yourself stuck out on the ledge_

_And there ain't no healing_

_From cutting yourself with the jagged edge_

As the song started, he heard Shizuo's voice as he kept on recording his message. Shivers ran down the informant's spine as he heard the lyrics.

_I'm telling you that_

_It's never that bad_

_Take it from someone who's been where you're at_

_Laid out on the floor _

_And you're not sure _

_You can take this anymore__  
><em> 

Shizuo was right… it somehow reminded Izaya of himself… it described this entire unwanted situation.

_So just give it one more try_

_To a lullaby_

_And turn this up on the radio_

_If you can hear me now_

_I'm reaching out _

_To let you know that you're not alone_

_And you can't tell I'm scared as hell_

_Cause I can't get you on the telephone_

_So just close your eyes_

_Well honey here comes a lullaby_

_Your very own lullaby_

Izaya frowned sadly, the song was beautiful. It saddened him because he knew he had ignored everyone's calls… but he had to, he didn't want anyone to get hurt… not anymore.

___Please let me take you_

_Out of the darkness and into the light_

_Cause I have faith in you _

_That you're going to make it through another night _

_Stop thinking about _

_The easy way out _

_There's no need to go and blow the candle out _

_Because you're not done_

_You're far too young and the best is yet to come_

A sob escaped his lips… Shizuo was telling him not to give up, because things would get better…but when? How did he know? And how would things get better?

_Well everybody's hit the bottom_

_And everybody's been forgotten_

_When everybody's tired of being alone _

_Yeah everybody's been abandoned_

_And left a little empty handed_

_So if you're out there barely hanging on_

___Just give it one more try_

_To a lullaby_

_And turn this up on the radio_

_If you can hear me now_

_I'm reaching out_

_To let you know that you're not alone_

_And you can't tell I'm scared as hell_

_Cause I can't get you on the telephone_

_So just close your eyes_

_Well honey here comes a lullaby_

_Your very own lullaby_

___Well honey here comes a lullaby_

_Your very own lullaby_

The song ended and with it came Shizuo's last words through the phone…

'I love you Izaya'__


	16. Chapter 16: What are you wainting for?

**Lg15: Hey, guys! **

**Shizuo: Where the hell have you been, huh? I just told Izaya how I felt and you disappear! **

**Izaya: Calm down, Shizu-chan~ it's not her fault, she's been horribly busy **

**Lg15: See? He understands!**

**Shizuo: *ignoring the author* don't call me that…**

**Izaya: But you said you loved me~ Hey author, what happened to Mairu?**

**Lg15: Oh, yeah… where's Mairu? O.o**

**Mairu: I'm right here -_-'**

**Lg15: There you are! Where have you been? D:**

**Mairu: You forgot about me you dumbass! **

**Lg15: Gomenasai .**

Chapter 16: What are you waiting for?

Shizuo sat on his couch staring off at the door as he waited. Waited for something that he knew very well would not happen… he kind of expected the brunet to appear at his door and tell him that he loved him too… but, then again, he knew it wouldn't happen… not after all the things he said.

There was no sound but Shizuo's soft breathing. His heart pumped calmly… but inside his head, everything changed. There was a battle in there, a side of him yelling at him that what he said was right and that it was all Izaya's fault for not telling him what was going on with his boss… but a bigger much stronger part of him screamed at his stupidness, screamed at him to run to his loved one's side and hug him ad tell him how sorry he was and just how much he truly loved him but… then there was fear.

There was a knock at his door which snapped him out of his thoughts quickly, he made his way towards the door and slowly opened it, revealing a teenage brunet…

"Shizu-chan…"

"Mairu, where have you been? I hadn't seen you in so long…" he said as he stepped aside to let her in, she walked directly towards the couch and sat, waiting for Shizuo to close the door and do the same.

"Shizuo… what are you doing?" she asked softly.

Shizuo frowned slightly, not really understanding the meaning of said question.

"What do you mean?" he asked back looking straight into her deep eyes.

"…why are you here?"

"Uh, I live here Mairu… I believe that's why I'm here, don't you think?" he was kind of really confused now, he didn't get it!

The young girl sighed a little irritated but looked slightly amused. "You really are a protozoan…" she murmured, but Shizuo heard.

"Hey! I'm not, I have a lot on my mind and… only Izaya calls me that, how did you know?" he asked and couldn't help but smile just a tiny bit as he remembered the informant's tone every time he called him that way.

"He wouldn't stop talking about how "stupid" you could be… "She chuckled lightly before continuing. "I mean, why are you here? You're supposed to be with Iza-nii right now, and yes, I already know you two fought but…"

She had a worried look on her young features now. "What is it?" asked the blonde.

"I have a feeling… it sort of aches… right here" she said pointing at where her heart was. "I can feel it… he's suffering… he's lost control of everything… he's scared" she whispered.

"But… you shouldn't have been that rude to him, Shizuo… Kururi and I knew who it was too… he was the one who planned the attack on us… so he could get a hold of Iza-nii" she kept on, her gaze now lost somewhere in the wall.

"Why didn't' he tell me then? I've been taking care of him for so long… I've grown so close to him, doesn't he trust me at all?" he asked gaze down.

"That's where you are wrong… Izaya cares about you so much, that he wouldn't be able to live with himself if something were to happen to you, he knows Shiki is capable of doing anything… he didn't want you to get hurt" she kept on defending her brother.

"…But, he knows I have this monstrous strength… I don't get it, I was shot! I came out of it alive, and he knows it…"

"Iza-nii may be sort of rude, annoying and an asshole at times… but he has a great heart" she finished.

They were both I silence for a while, Shizuo and Mairu looking into each other's eyes intently… the blonde found no trace of lying in her eyes… and Mairu found no rage towards her brother in his…

"You need to go get him, Shizuo… please, please don't let my brother die" there were tears in her eyes as she whispered this, brokenly.

Shizuo slowly stood up… he had decided. He would go get Izaya, and he would make that fucking son of a bitch pay for every time he dared to touch one if _his_ brunet's hair.

A smirk made its way to his lips; he brought his fists up and made his bones make a little snap.

"I'm going to get him, Mairu… I'm going to bring him back, I promise" he started making his way to the door.

"You really love him… don't you?"

"…Yes" he answered and then went out the door, starting his way to Shinjuku.

~Izaya's apartment~

After the message had ended, Izaya stared at the phone with wide eyes. Had Shizuo just… no…

_**He… he said he loved me… HE SAID HE LOVED ME! Could it be true? Does he really feel the same way? Is this really happening?**_

Thousands of thoughts swirled around his head after those three words were spoken… he had been waiting so long for this moment… but he… he wanted to hear it again… he wanted Shizuo to tell him right in front of him…

The brunet was so lost on his own thoughts that he hadn't realized that he had gotten a hold of his still sort of dirty blade and was now sitting on the couch, again staring at the wall.

He didn't hear the door open, to reveal a, once again, drunk Shiki. He just noticed when the man started kissing his abused neck.

But what made this time different? This time… Izaya was planning to fight back.

He had a reason. And that reason had blonde hair and was the most amazing person the informant had ever met apart from his family… and that reason was named Shizuo Heiwajima. The man who had slowly stolen his heart…

The reason why right now instead of being dragged into his bedroom, he had punched Shiki as hard as he could, which wasn't much because of his weak state.

Shiki was a bit disorientated at first, but then he grabbed a hold of Izaya's hair and threw him against the glass window again, a slight crack appearing once again.

But, the informant wasn't about to give up just yet, he winced at the contact his head made but he got back up and launched at the man with his flick blade, successfully making a deep cut to his cheek… a pained yell echoing in the apartment.

There was moment of silence before a loud slapping sound echoed through the place; Izaya's pained whimpered following close behind…

~Outside~

As Shizuo reached Izaya's apartment building, he froze right on his tracks… there were police cars, two ambulances and people blocking the entrance.

He ran to an officer and quickly asked what was going on.

"A neighbor called and said that there was sounds of someone screaming inside apartment d-12, the biggest one in the building, that's the window to it, but there's not light on" the officer explained.

"That's Izaya Orihara's apartment… I know him, please, I came here to get him out of there, there's someone hurting him, please you have to let me through" he explained quickly, looking up at the window… where he noticed something strange.

"I'm sorry sir, but-"

"Wait, can you hand me that light? It'll be quick…" he asked, the officer gave it to him frowning slightly and followed he light, right to where Shizuo was pointing…

It was a crack on the window… but that's not what made the shiver lightly… it was the blood trailing down from it.

Not even bothering to ask again, Shizuo ignored the officer's calls and stormed off to the stairs, running with all of his might.

_Please… please, if you really are there, God, please don't take him away from me, please…_

The raven's door finally came into view… he was close. Only a couple of feet more… and he would reunite once again with his beloved brunet.

**Lg15: Yeah… not such a good chapter but, this is almost coming to an end and it will be better, I've been horribly busy with school and I was like oh, God, I haven't updated in like two weeks… D" Hope you may forgive me and please wait for me, I love you all thank you for your support.**


	17. Chapter 17: Payback

**LG15: I can't explain how happy I am right now XD 100 reviews! Thank you so much, I never thought that this story would have such a success :') Lol, sorry for the wait… problems with the internet ^^'.**

Chapter 17: Payback

Izaya had run into the kitchen, grabbing a hold of one of the many knives he owned. Shiki's crazed laughter filled the apartment as he chased the informant around.

"Come on, Izaya-kun… don't be like that" cooed Shiki as he carefully tried to approach the informant, who had a big knife pointed at him.

Shivers ran up and down Izaya's spine, police sirens could be heard outside, but he couldn't lose his focus.

The knife trembled in his pale hand; Shiki smirked at this and kept approaching the brunet.

"D-don't come any closer…" whispered Izaya.

He didn't listen; he slowly grabbed a hold of Izaya's hand and made him drop the knife. Izaya let out a shaky sigh… he couldn't do it, he didn't have the guts to kill him.

Shiki chuckled and moved to the wall, smashing Izaya's head against it; again, just for the fun of it… the brunet just winced, feeling dizzy but he kept steady.

His stalker leaned down and kissed him roughly and then took a deep breath at his neck. He then started licking his collar bone, none of them noticed the heavy footsteps that could be heard coming from outside.

It wasn't until the door smashed open that Izaya noticed. Shiki just kept kissing him, while the raven's eyes went wide at the sight of a fuming Shizuo.

"GET THE HELL AWAY FROM HIM YOU ASSHOLE!" Shiki was, literally, ripped off Izaya and thrown against the other side of the apartment, while the informant slid to the floor, finally giving into the pain and exhaustion that was invading his malnourished body.

Shizuo stomped towards Shiki and lifted him up by the neck, making the… rather old guy look at him straight in the eye.

"YOU…TELL ME… WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS TO HIM? TELL ME, DAMN IT!" demanded the furious blonde.

Shiki smirked at him and answered calmly. "He's mine… and he had turned me down once, I did not take it easy the second… that's the why of his sisters… those annoying little pests" he muttered under his breath.

"Plus, I've made him my own pleasure machine…" he whispered with the most perverted look Shizuo had ever seen… it wasn't even funny.

Time froze for the slightest of seconds… until the cup was tipped over.

"YOU MOTHERFUCKER!" the ex-bartender grabbed the nearest table he saw and smashed it against the "business" man, making him fall to the floor.

He was lifted again by Shizuo, who threw him across the apartment, breaking the glass table that seconds ago had decorated Izaya's living room. The blonde stomped to him and grabbed his arm, quickly twisting it in a position that was clearly not natural; a loud crack went through the room, followed by a pained scream.

"Son of a bitch… did you know one of them died! You're a fucking asshole!"

He grabbed Shiki's head and started smashing it against the glass window; blood started pouring down his face as he yelled in the obvious but well deserved pain.

Shizuo dropped him to the floor and took the knife he saw next to them. He looked at it and then lay on top of Shiki, pressing the blade against his neck. Shiki froze at that moment, but then started laughing.

"You won't do it, Heiwajima-san… you won't be able to live with yourself knowing that you killed someone" he rasped as he spit some blood, smirking as he stared at the panting blonde.

Shizuo growled and sliced a thin, quickly bleeding line against Shiki's neck, making him gasp. "I really hope you rot in hell…"

Shizuo dropped the knife and kicked the man before turning around and rushing towards the informant, who hadn't moved an inch since he dropped to the floor in a sitting position.

"Izaya…hey, can you hear me?" he called softly, trying not to scare the trembling brunet any further.

A whimper was his answer so, as carefully as he could, he lifted the injured informant and walked to the elevator, now, willing to wait for it to come all the way up.

The blonde caressed Izaya's head with his cheek as he held him closer, the elevator dinged (?) and he went in, pressing the button and waiting, just staring at the dazed man in his arms.

As they finally reached the first floor, many people started yelling at the blonde at the same time. They wanted to take Izaya to a hospital, but he said that it wouldn't be necessary; he would take him to a doctor immediately.

A police officer was about to start asking unnecessary questions so Shizuo cut him off quickly.

"Hey, that trash is still up there go arrest him before I go back and kill him…" with that, Shizuo disappeared from sight, making his way, again, to Shinra's.

**Lg15: I'm sorry it's so short, but hey, next chapter will be fluffy: 3 yay~! Lol, really… sorry about that XD Hope you liked it, Shizuo's act wasn't any bloodier because, remember I talk Spanish and couldn't really figure out how to write it. Thank you for reading! **


	18. Chapter 18: Mark me

**LG15: Hey, guys I don't really have anything to say so… je, sorry about that. Anyway, here's another chapter, hope you like it: 3**

Chapter 18: Mark me

~Couple of days later~

"Well, there hasn't been much to do so… I guess that's all for today, Shizuo" said Tom as he and the strong blonde walked down one of the many busy streets of Ikebukuro.

The ex-bartender looked down at his boss and nodded. "Okay, then… bye, Tom" he was about to walk away, but Tom's voice stopped him.

"It's good to have you back, Shizuo"

He looked slightly over his shoulder and felt a little smile form in his lips; he said nothing and then started his way towards certain doctor's.

~Shinra's~

_KNOCK, KNOCK, KNOCK_

"Coming!" called Shinra as he placed a cup of tea on a tray. He left it behind and went to open the door; he knew who it was so he didn't bother to check.

"Hey, Shizuo, come in" he said as he started walking back to the kitchen, leaving the door open for the blonde.

"Any changes today?" asked the blonde as he leaned against the kitchen's door frame.

Shinra sighed as he finished pouring some soup he had been cooking onto a small bowl, placing it, too, in the tray.

"I don't know, he… he just stares at nothing, he hasn't eaten anything…he says he can't" he said as he took the tray and started making his way towards the brunet's room, Shizuo following closely behind.

The door was open so the doctor stopped right in front of it, peeking in slowly as if trying not to scare the person inside.

"Izaya, we're coming in, ok?" he received no response from him, so they both allowed their way in.

The brunet was sitting in the bed, staring outside at some spot that none of them could really see. His calm, emotionless face turned to the side to look at them and then went slightly down to the tray in the doctor's hands; he frowned a little at it.

"I'm not hungry, Shinra…" he whispered, his voice sounding weak and tired.

Shinra was about to step forward to give Izaya his daily speech of how bad this was for him and this and that, but Shizuo placed a hand on his shoulder and leaned to reach his ear.

"I'll talk to him, give me the tray"

Shinra nodded and gave him the tray, looking again at the thin young man on the bed, before heading out the door. 

Shizuo closed it before turning towards the informant.

The blonde made his way towards the bed and sat only to meet with a blade being held unexpectedly against his chest.

"Shizuo…" the raven whispered as he looked into the eyes above him.

The blonde gulped and stared into the other's eyes and flinched back when he saw the storm of emotions in them.

"What is it?" he whispered back.

The blade was away from his chest and now pointed at the informant's neck. "Is it true? Or did I just… dream it or hallucinated?" he asked as he gazed down to his lap.

"What?"

"…Do you really love me?" there were tears menacing to fall down off those crimson orbs now…

Shizuo tried to not snap at him but… how could he really be asking that? After all they had been through together?

"I love you, Izaya… how can you doubt it?"

Tears streamed down the pale skin now… "But… I'm so dirty and impure… how can you still love me when I'm such a mess? How is it possible? Why do you make me feel like this? Why does my heart pump so hard? Why?" he sobbed.

Shizuo leaned closer to him, trying to hold back his need to shut the other up with a kiss…

"You listen to me… you are not dirty, you are not impure… You may be a mess, but I've been working on it… I've been fixing you for the last couple of months and… and in that time I grew closer and closer to you and I realized that I never hated you… and then I could see how beautiful you are and how amazing… I fell in love with you Izaya… I love you so much" there, the blonde let it all out…

_Oh, how I want to kiss you right now… but I don't want to scare you, you're still recovering from what that… damned asshole did to you…_

Shizuo wiped away Izaya's tears carefully, as if any harsh movement would break the small man next to him.

Izaya sniffed and gazed at the blade before looking back at Shizuo. "Shizu-chan… can you… carve your initials? Right here… I want to believe that it was you who did it… not him" he asked in a small voice, but Shizuo could hear it crystal clear.

Mocha eyes widened in shock… "Izaya… no, I don't want to see you in pain again… I can't do it" he said.

"It'll be ok… I want you to do it, please…"

Shizuo hesitated before taking the blade, watching as Izaya slowly lay back and exposed his pale neck right where those cursed words had been "written".

With a shaky hand, he gently… as carefully as he was able to, pierced the skin a little… a small, thin trail of blood started coming out of it as Shizuo formed an 'S'. Then, he quickly did the same next to the 'S', this time forming an 'H'.

Izaya whimpered a little in pain, making Shizuo flinch. "Sorry…" he whispered.

He saw Izaya gulp and grit his teeth as he stared at the bloody neck… and did what his instincts told him to.

Leaning down, Shizuo started licking away the blood from the elegantly carved 'S'. A shiver ran down the raven's back and a small gasp escaped the pale throat. The blonde did the same with the 'H', but this time, instead of stopping at the end of the letter he kept going up.

Slowly, he soon reached the other's collarbone… then towards his pale, perfect lips. He licked Izaya's lips and he looked into the other's eyes. Crimson orbs were wide and unblinking. The raven let out a shaky breath and tried to sit only to be stopped by Shizuo.

"Shizu-chan…"

"Yes?" they were leaning closer to each other again…

"I love you" until they're lips sealed into the most longed, awaited, loving, sweet kiss anyone could have ever seen.


	19. Chapter 19: Leave it all behind

**LG15: So… This is it everyone ^-^ Here's the last chapter, I hope you all like it.**

Chapter 19: Leave it all behind…

It was… oh, how to describe it? It was the most amazing; the most… waited moment for both of them. Izaya's arms had slowly made their way around Shizuo's neck, getting the two a little closer.

That is until the lack of air got the best of them. They panted, trying to catch their breath as they stared, again, at each other's eyes.

"Did you know how beautiful you are?" whispered the blonde.

The informant glared daggers at the blonde as his face went through several different tones of red, failing miserably as he intended to hide his face behind his bangs.

"S-Shut up, protozoan…" he muttered as he positioned himself against Shizuo's chest, feeling the blonde's fingers running through his hair.

Silence evaded the room and Shizuo eyed the bowl of soup next to them. He took it and placed it on the smaller one's lap. "You need to eat something… please" he said in a low, pleading voice as his nose traced small circles around the brunet's hair.

A shiver ran down Izaya's back ad he took a deep breath before answering. "Is not that I don't want to, Shizu-chan… I just won't be able to hold it down, so why eat it if it's coming back out?" he explained as he held the spoon between his fingers, mixing the soup around, not really planning on putting it into his mouth.

"You have to try… you'll die of starvation, Izaya… I don't want to lose you, please"

Leaning his head against the blonde's shoulder, Izaya looked up at him; he could see the worry in those enchanting mocha eyes and could not help but feel somewhat guilty about it. His gaze went back to the bowl and he sighed.

Taking a spoonful, he slowly put it into his mouth, swallowing as slowly as he could so he wouldn't upset his aching stomach. Noticing how he hadn't felt sick like the other times, he kept on eating… doing it a little faster until he was eating like he usually (before all of this) did.

Shizuo smiled when he noticed the, now, empty bowl. He took it and placed it back on the table, taking a hold of the other's pale hand.

"Do you feel sick?" he could not help but ask, just in case.

"No…"

"Um, Izaya?" the ex-bartender's voice sounded nervous, which was of course weird of him.

"What is it?"

…

"Shizuo…?"

"I want you to move in with me…" he whispered as a blush took over his cheeks.

"Eh?" now both of them were blushing.

"You heard me… I bought another apartment near this place, it's almost as big as yours… um, and so what do you say?" he asked.

He thought about it for a second… staying in his apartment wasn't going to help much right now, he wouldn't sell it but… maybe staying away from it would be best right now.

"…Sure, I would love to"

A couple of days later, the two found themselves inside Izaya's apartment. A couple of boxes stood next to the door and the brunet could be seen putting some clothes into another one.

"Hey, Izaya? Are this ready to go?" asked Shizuo from the door.

The informant looked slightly over his shoulder and nodded. "Yes, you can take them away" he called back.

Standing up, Izaya could not help but feel a little nostalgic. This had been his home for the past… nearly 10 years… and now he was leaving it behind for some time.

All the furniture was covered with curtains and old bed sheets, the big glass window hidden behind the curtain…

Everything had been fixed, nothing left behind to be a reminder… except for his memories. He would still have nightmares, but Shizuo would always be there to wake him and hold him until he calmed down.

He was snapped out of his thought when a pair of strong arms went over his waist, holding him close.

"You ready?"

"Yeah, let's go…"

And all that was left inside that apartment was the soft click that announced it had been locked.

(About three months later…)

"Are you sure? I don't want you to feel obligated…"

"I'm sure…"

~8~

Moans and kissing sounds came from the recently new bedroom at the end of the new apartment… two lovers, melting into each other's arms as the tall one reached his climax.

Panting, they lay hugging each other close. They stared at each other and kissed again, letting the night sky and moonlight know just how much they loved each other.

_**The end**_

**LG15: Thank you so much for all the support you gave me, you don't know how happy all if those simple reviews made me c: I can't think of a way to show you how thankful I am, I love you so much, take care and I guess we'll read each other soon **


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